Re: main sail blown?
Am I the only one here wondering what the outhaul tension was, sounds like there was a forward bubble in the main (which is OK as you want to depower, but it indicates the slot was too narrow too, so either the draft was too deep in the main, or the jib was really sheeted in close)?
This is a complicated answer for sure. Overpowered is overpowered. What everyone here has done is given you a way to depower.
Assuming your rig tension is tight (not allowing the mast to pump or drop, so basically not moving).
Assuming your rake (how far back the mast is angled) is correct.
Things to depower:
Move your jib-cars back (allows twist off at the top of the jib)
Vang on, and on harder as the winds go up (pulls the boom down, bends the mast, flattens the leech)
Mainsheet on hard (flattens the leech, bends the mast, flattens the mainsail, changes angle of attack)
Traveler on center and dropped to leeward (to twist off the main, and changes angle of attack) as it gets windier
Cunningham gets tensioned (this pulls the draft forward on the main-lower, as you tension the others, tension this, as the others pull the draft back, this will pull it back forward).
Halyard on harder (pulls the draft forward on the main-top)
Outhaul on harder (flattens the lower 1/3 of the main draft).
Backstay on harder (takes the dip out of the headstay on a masthead, does same on a fractional, but also helps to bend the mast on the fractional, which helps to flatten the main, and also reduce draft)...
So lemme summarize... tighten everything evenly as the winds pipe up, to help depower your rig, except the jib cars, they should just be moved back to depower.
Boatless - suffering through liars and used car [pronounced boat] salespeople who are incapable to seeing the truth.