Re: main sail blown?
I'm seeing two separate questions that have been confused here:
1-Is the trim right?
2-Is the main blown?
And for #2 I would suggest the snuggle test. Rub your cheek on the main. Would you get rug burn if you used it as bedding? If yes, the sail is probably OK. If the sail is too soft to give you rug burn, it is probably blown out.
Odds are that every lo9cal loft will be glad to schedule a visit to your boat, to loan you someone who knows rigging and sails and can put eyeballs on things to give you a better answer. Sure, they're not objective, but a number of them actually know the best long term business is not to sell you a new sail unles you need it, so some of them are likely to say "You don't need a new sail, you need to..." and if you hear the same story from two or more of them, that's probably true.
On the other hand if they all guffaw and offer you condolences, you probably need a new sail.