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I have never found the utilitarian view to be of help in my marriage, and I am not holding up my marriage, and especially me, as any sort of ideal in marriage. Basically, I feel if you're keeping score you're mistaking marriage for a baseball game. Love is that thing that keeps you together when you really think that killing each other would be nice. Like when she guts your new house's kitchen to the level of a racket-ball court. (see my litany of woe in the Boat Bucks thread) A few days later, perspective returns, the kitchen needed remodeling anyway, and you start to consider how you can market her in the "best pound for pound" demolisher in North America so you can make some money to re-do the kitchen.
Gay marriage is an oxymoron.
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If waterboarding was a sexual preference they'd be teaching it in schools.
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