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post #1 of Old 07-02-2007 Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Michigan
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Stupid Boat Tricks

The 4th of July thread got me thinking. I have the perfect slip for the 4th of July. Unfortunately, a nice doctor from Alabama chartered my boat this week so I won't be able to use the slip or the boat.

First boat tricks.

When in my slip and sitting in the stern, I can look at a boat ramp. Actually, 6 lanes into the water about 200' away. Normally just a few boats at a time using the ramp. However, on the 4th of July they start lining up about 6:00 AM and by 9:00 the line is about a mile long. Tempers tend to flare, people do great jobs of backing up and into things, husbands yell at wives, wives tell their husband endearing things at many different decimal levels, fist fights break out, police show up, at least two people get put in police cars for a ride to the station, and the fun goes on. All of this is finished by about noon and things settle down for a few hours. Now remember, this is in the morning and only about 30% are drinking that early.
The real fun begins about 9:00 PM when the crowds really get thick to pull the boats back out. Now there are nice people mixed into this crowd, but by this time a much higher percentage has had more than one drink. In some cases the only reason they are pulling the boat out is because they ran out of beer. The fights begin again, at least one car ends up much wetter than planned, divorce proceedings begin for some, a few more take a ride in a police car, and by midnight things quiet down again.

Is it boating or the holiday that brings out the best in these folks. Happy 4th of July. I will celebrate it on land this year.Have a great holiday and visit your local boat ramp for some entertainment.
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