I'd say most are quite anal
I don't think this is the crux of your thread but I've learned not to take anything personally. Whether it's how to handle the sails during a maneuver to how to tie a certain knot, I've literally yet to meet two people who are the same. I've been praised for one thing one week and chastised for the same thing the next week on a different boat (well, chastised is a harsh word but told it was wrong). At the same time, there's obviously a lot of differences in the way a specific boat will handle. Particularly in racing, I try and ask a few basic questions such as: does the skipper want you to back the jib at all through a tack, etc.
I usually like when the owner does the dock lines so if it floats away in the next storm it won't be my fault