Tiller between my legs most of the time, or controlling it with my foot. I rarely use a winch handle, and most of the time I bypass the winch altogether, depending on the wind I am sailing in. I also ALWAYS have stopper knots tied with the sheets running through the cleats. If it gets to be too much at times, I will often drop the jib/genny and fly under main alone. I find it to be a whole lot easier to handle, especially for a beginner singlehanding when there is a lot of marina traffic.
Being a beginner sailor, I try to mostly give everything a try to see what flows well for me. I singlehand a lot, so this thread has been pretty interesting, to see the way that other people do it.