I can't quite tell from your question if you're looking for a hired captain, or rather an instructor who will help both of you become your own skippers. The former is an employee, the latter a mentor.
Assuming the latter:
Everything you've mentioned is important. So also is the ability to communicate and teach, which is essential no matter how much skill or sea time the capt/instructor has. The idea is to get theoretical knowledge from a book, into your brain, then into your fingertips, so that it all becomes secondary (remember learning to drive?).
You learn to sail by sailing, period.. Alternate that with book study, and both will make more sense to you as you go along. You need a variety of experience, weather, geography, and maybe even instructors too, to become a well-rounded sailor. So don't necessarily confine yourself to one instructor, any more than you would have confined yourself to one teacher while coming up through your primary and secondary education ashore. We all have our own teaching styles, and learning styles, so the more of them you experience, the better. Some people learn better by spoken words, some by sight, some by feel, some by the written page..
I teach sailing a few times a month as a weekend gig, and believe I do it reasonably well, but always recommend to students that they get taught by more than one instructor.
Hope this is of help.