Thank you for your kind words. I try to be helpful. In many ways a J-30 might actually be a good boat for what you are doing. The compartively small jibs
are easier for a small crew to handle. J-30''s are easier to handle than many of the ''brute strength race boats'' that are out there and for casual racing you might get by with the two of you as long as you are willing to pick the right sail for the conditions meaning stepping down to a #2 or # 3 when things pick up.
In many ways a Laser 28 would be a good boat in the light air conditions. I raced mine as a couples boat and it was great in that role. Laser 28''s are easy to tow being 4100 lbs vs the J-30''s 7500, and the Laser is a legal width as well. In a breeze the Laser takes a bit more skill and an understanding how to ''shift gears'' but the nice thing is that all of the tools are there to do so quickly on the fly.
Another good choice might be an S2 9.1. These are well rounded boats with good sailing ability in a wide range of conditions. They generally require a stronger crew but if you aren''t racing with a spinacker they can be raced by a couple.
Kirby 30''s make good bargain racers and offer a middle ground between the Laser 28 and the J-30.