MC1,
When you try heaving to, also try heaving to with just the main (reefed to appropriate wind speed). I have found the 34 has enough windage forward of the mast to allow it to fore reach with main alone (helm down). It won't gather enough way to tack and will actually ride higher to the wind that way. The main should be sheeted in fairly close. This also saves wear on the stays'l.
If I can keep sail on her to heave to, I will usually keep sailing, but sometimes you just need to rest (cook or whatever). If I can't get any sail up, I lay ahull. By that time there's enough wind in the top hamper to keep the boat fairly steady, although even with the helm down the boat will usually lay no closer than 70 or 80 degrees to the wind (keep the foredeck clear). I don't know whether that would be the case with roller
furling (which I don't have) because of the increased drag forward when it's furled.
When the seas start throwing the boat around, it's time to think about running off. Of course these kinds of conditions are rare.
Dave Mancini
PSC34 #305 "Swan"