As President Obama takes a seat on the bench of Camp David for the weekend we can reflect back on his first two weeks in office. What's the line from
Top Gun; you had a hell of a first day there, son?
The real question that dare not be spoke is whether Obama is actually this weak and willing to allow the Democrat machine to dictate his policy for him, or he's just distracted by the fact he cannot find an honest cabinet nominee. Not much of a choice there. One does have to wonder what one was thinking when they let a perfectly adequate hairdresser like Nancy Pelosi get running around making policy. Face it, the gal's an 'M' and a 'v' short of a full bottle of Mondavi.
Plan B to Madame Pelosi seems to Barney Frank. Why haven't you heard more from this brilliant man and consummate politician in the past? Ummm. Because the Clinton administration knew that brilliant as he may be he has the distressing habit of hopping into a nearby phone booth, with the bus-boy from the IHOP. Barney's a ticking bomb, as in bombast. If he doesn't screw himself by something he says, it's be something else he does with his mouth. This is news?
Speaking of bombast. Who'd a thunk that the follicley-challenged Joe Biden was just the opening salvo in a series of mis-steps in appointments. One can only imagine what it would take old blow-dry Joe to gain access to the grounds of Camp David at the moment. Due the separation of powers doctrine I doubt an act of Congress would turn the trick.
SNL should just hire him directly as they cannot mock him any more than he does daily himself.
The rest of the nominees look scarily suspicious as well. Adam Smith pick up line two, apparently there's only one man left on the North American continent who understanding capitalism but is unable to use
Turbo Tax well enough to avoid what the babysitter next door realizes ain't gonna fly. Options? Nah, the President-elect didn't have any options, he only has former T-Sec Larry Summers chillin' in the Rose Garden, not to mention the last messianic economic figure in western capitalism, some with a proven record o knowing what the heck is going on in Paul Volcker.
Leon Panetta is an apparently fine man and a long time public servant. He should by now be either running the Burlington Northern Railroad or making movies with Pacino and DeNiro. There are even a lot of cabinet positions that we'd be delighted to see him in. Director of the CIA isn't one of them. Remember the Church Commission. If you do, you'll know why American intelligence was where it was on 11 September 2001 and why the prospects for the future do not look good. Good land soon available for development in northern Virginia.
The laugher of the week, unless you're watching Globetrotter videos at Camp David, had to be Tom Daschle. Good old Tom Daschle from South Dakota, the guy with the pink ties. No one thought that anyone would remember what a nasty partisan divisive Speaker of the House he'd been. Tom was the guy who made the name Chavez into an acronym for WASP, the Chavez in question being the highly talented Linda who had a few tax issues for some maybe legal household help. Nobody would remember hypocrisy like that, right? Somewhere in the DC metro area a very tired Latina rests an arthritic right index finger and gently returns her phone to it's cradle as if, well, she was placing eggs in basket. Big eggs, but pretty well cracked. And, oh yeah, this was the guy that was going to spearhead the health-care rainbow in America. At the rate political capital is being expended, that plan isn't good for much more than an aspirin right now.
Foreign affairs has been largely spent raising the ire of France and Canada over trade policy, normally a cause for general optimism about the status of world affairs. Given that these two allies appear in the presidential rear-view mirror flipping him the bird it's somewhat understandable that the chauffeur, an endangered position in Democrat circles, doesn't see the road-closed signs posted by the Russians or Iranians, or that sawn-off Asiatic Ross Perot imitator Il Wind, or something.
Yup, a heck of a first two weeks. The current rate of progress holds great promise for fully-funded midnight basketball programs across the fruited plain. (sorry Barney, I know you're not exactly a Gus-macker) And we haven't even discussed the new Gitmo policy, the one that plans to free one of the 9/11 plotters and a bunch of others, the one that's going to make NYC firehouses a Republican stronghold for a decade if last week is any indication. Yeah we're closin' the old death camp down, puttin' away the Model A generator and it's alligator clips, heck, for all I know my old classmate Admiral Busby may be having lunch with Raoul discussing a land for peace option. But we're keeping rendition. Some people call it extraordinary rendition. I guess that's how you feel about it after you wake up in an Egyptian gaol after falling asleep at Club Gitmo. They say the frost in the cells in Bulgaria has to be seen to be fully appreciated this time of year. And no, they don't have to tell us who they've got or where they've got them. We're treating the war on terror as a
PR problem, which is another thing. Any out of work advert flacks should contact the White House immediately. Are you hearin' me, Detroit? The WH is having a little trouble coming up with a new term for the former war on terror. The Semite Skirmish isn't showing much traction, particularly in sections of Queens, NY. The problem is centered around the fact that we've gone to war on everything from drugs to illiteracy and now we don't really have a term for the plan which involves killing our enemies. Rest easy, we'll probably finesse the whole deal by declaring victory and stop attempting to kill anyone, except maybe African babies.
Lastly comes the news that faith-based charities that receive government aid will no longer be required to be, well, based upon faith. Or much of anything else for that matter. Community organizations, you knew this was coming didn't you, will now be eligible for faith-based funding and status. Next time you look at that government funding chart you'll notice the big wedge of what looks like blueberry next to the rhubarb of defense is actually ACORN spending. If the Amazon Lesbian Brigade of Dykes on Bikes goes operational with the US Army you may see a purple blending of the two reflecting the "Chicago Way" in action.
I didn't really mean to go on like this but, well, you just cannot make this stuff up. I really intended to alert you to a pithy and trenchant column by Mark Steyn here:
Mark Steyn: Obama mythology could use some stimulus | obama, hope, water, walk, didn - Opinion - OCRegister.com I must have gotten thrown for a loop by the February thaw.