anybody else in this boat
Belliegirl, I was timed out at the station and had to rush my thought, so let me expand a bit before wishing you well.
You seem to have serious commitments where you are so I would say the first thing is to embrace and honor the dreams that brought you there. For myself, a sip of wine or one lick on an icecream cone isn''t very satisfying. I would say protect and keep the sailing dream that is at present stifled. Life is short and yet we do have time to use. In my case I was drawn to sailing in the 70''s and have had a lifelong interest, but because of committments like yours and a lack of time and money I never even considered that I might actually have a boat and act on the dream. Now that I am in my fifties I find I live in a state of perfect freedon that I never expected planned for or would have been able to appreciate 20 years ago when I really ached for it. As for my sailing dream I joined a sailing club for a year and now own a balboa 8.2 which stirs my heart, but my wife''s dream is cycle touring. We expect to be able to sail later into life than we will be able to ride so touring comes first. The surprising thing for me is that cycling is fulfilling a lot of the expectations I had for sailing. The desire I had as a younger man for adventure has grown into a desire for a radically simple life that would be literally illegal ashore. Illegal unless one is a bicycle nomad. Everything we need for comfort and happiness we carry on our bikes. It has become a joke with my wife that as we put on our helmets in the morning and get ready to ride I have to say "I think this is going to be a good day". And usually as we go through the last little routines of the day in our tent I have to say "hasn''t this been a great day". The longer we ride we meet people who have toured different routes and different countries and continents all over the world and the possibilities are so very attractive. I believe that someday we will put Quattro de Mayo back in the water but it is getting really hard to think about saying "I''m through riding".
I hope I''ve understood your appeal and have given something that is sympathetic and encouraging. I would say life is full of blessings so savor the ones you have, protect and cherish your dream and don''t ever pass on a chance to act.