The idea of sailing school is excellent. There are lots to choose from. At least consider the school on North Sound in the BVI. There are also regularly scheduled classes for ladies only. Some real advantages for you in yur situation. A further thought is to consider taking a week-10 day bare boat charter in the Virgin Islands with an instructor/captain.
Even though your neighboring yacht club has a waiting list, I would encourage you to find out when they schedule races, and on those days just show up, asking if anyone needs help or crew. This is a real win/win situation. They need crew, and you need sailing experience.