Whitby 42/Brewer 12.8
Let me start by saying that if you are going with just you and your wife, and she's willing but not enthusiastic (which is what I'm gathering), I question whether you will be sailing the 5 Capes, or why you would even want to do so.
In any event, I think a great boat that is now a budget boat, is the Whitby 42 or its close cousin the Brewer 12.8. They both are essentially the same boat, but the Brewer is considered more the performance oriented of the two.
They are built like a brick house, have an incredibly comfortable and easy motion, have huge tankage, lots of space, great storage, a very comfortable cockpit, shippy looking, split rig so easy to handle for short-handed crew (particularly a husband and wife crew), and a whole lot more to recommend them. Plus, they can be had for substantially less than your budget, meaning under $100,000.
The downside is that they are old at this point, and likely will need meaningful upgrades, depending on the boat you can find. But, based on the initial purchase price, you can refit them completely and still be way under your budget.
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