My heart goes out to you. That is a tall task you've been handed. But I've noticed that only those who are capable seem to get the assignment. I'll bet you and your wife make a remarkable couple.
I would also like to applaud your efforts to add some sailing into your family's lifestyle. Maybe your son will take to it in unexpected ways? It can't hurt to try.
I have no first hand experience with autistic children. So my suggestions may not be appropriate. But it occurs to me that, given your son's preference to remain home in his secure environment, maybe you could begin introducing sailing to him through videos and movies about sailing? Or books and magazines? This might familiarize him a bit and help him get his head around the idea of someday giving it a try.
A trailerable daysailer sounds like a good choice for you right now. Your idea of parking it in the driveway and letting him climb/play on it is a good one too. And the advantage of this approach is you and your wife could take turns bringing the other kids out for a jaunt even if your autistic son can't always come along. This might give each of you a much needed/deserved break. Sailing is a lot of things to a lot of people, but one common theme is that most find it very rejuvenating.
Hopefully Brad (Bene505) and others will chime in with other suggestions.
All the best to you.
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Pacific Seacraft Crealock 31 #62
NEVER CALLS CRUISINGDAD BACK....CAN"T TAKE THE ACCENT