I would highly recommend getting and reading Dave Seidman's book, THE COMPLETE SAILOR, which is about $16 in the local bookstore.
Easing the main sheet is a good idea when headed upwind, and adding reefing points and putting in a reef when you first think that it might be a good idea are key.
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You know what the first rule of sailing is? ...Love. You can learn all the math in the 'verse, but you take
a boat to the sea you don't love, she'll shake you off just as sure as the turning of the worlds. Love keeps
her going when she oughta fall down, tells you she's hurting 'fore she keens. Makes her a home.
—Cpt. Mal Reynolds, Serenity (edited)
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Still—DON'T READ THAT POST AGAIN.