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Observations on Growing Older
~Your kids are becoming you...and you don't like them
...but your grandchildren are perfect!
~Going out is good. Coming home is better!
~When people say you look "Great"... they add "for your age!"
~When you needed the discount, you paid full price.
Now you get discounts on everything...
movies, hotels, flights, but you're too tired to use them..
~You forget names ... but it's OK because other people forgot
they even knew you!!!
~The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15 and you have a better
chance
of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.
~You realize you're never going to be really good at anything
....
especially golf.
~Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't
remember.
~The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do,
but you really do care that you don't care to do them anymore.
~Your husband sleeps better on a lounge chair with the
TV blaring than he does in bed. It's called his "pre-sleep".
~Remember when your mother said,
"Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"?
Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!
~You used to say, "I hope my kids GET married...
Now, "I hope they STAY married!"
~You miss the days when everything worked
with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch..
~When GOOGLE, ipod, email, modem ... were unheard of, and
a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.
~You used to use more 4 letter words .. "what?"..."when?"... ???
~Now that you can afford
expensive jewelry, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.
.
~Your husband has a night out with the guys,
but he's home by 9:00 P.M. Next week it will be 8:30 P.M.
~You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you've read it.
~Notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!
~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.
~Everybody whispers.
~Now that your husband has retired, you'd give anything if he'd
find a job!
~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet . 2 of which you will
never wear.
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