Hi I am not familair with the Yanmar but at 4200 lbs it is a very light performace design so needing lots of crew can be expected. You do not mention what sails you have, dacron, kevlar?
You should try not to heel more than 20 degrees, it will slow you down after that.To reduce heeling especially if dacron you need to get the flattening reef and cunnigham in tight. Then drop the traveller all the way down if necessary. I assume you have a smaller headsail so that choice should have already been made.
It may be time to have your sails ceheck over by a sail maker and get his opinion on the, a bit hard to do on hte Net.
