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post #1 of Old 07-24-2006 Thread Starter
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Join Date: May 2006
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Talking Rum Pub..for Sailors!

This is (hic) my thread...I would like to think of it as a kind of Rum Pub for REAL Sailors. (Without getting blown overboard!).

You can think whatever you want. (Within the Rules of Homeland Security)...and you don't have to apologize for falling off the stool and you don’t go to jail if you get caught walking back to your boat. If you disagree with me or anyone who responds you can take it out on the water or into the back alley or you can just write it out.

Here is the Scope of this Thread:

1. If your rear end sits in the pub for more than 28 days a month. You can’t go sail. You must go home and sober up!
2. If you are simply sitting down because you are still trying to deal with land sickness because your feet haven’t touched land in several days, you are a sailor and belong here.
3. If you think a woman can't sit on a bar stool and buy her own rum or sail her 27 foot O'Day out of her slip singlehanded...You can’t drink here and she won’t let you go sailing with her.
4. If you put down your rum in 15 knots of wind because the motion makes you sick and you can’t keep drinking ....You don't belong here.
5. If you don't go out when it's blowin over 25 cause you drank to much the night before...You don't sail.
6. If you don't like the taste of Rum then drink something else and go sailing!.
7. If you’ve ever said you’re to hung over to go sailing, you don’t belong here.
8. If the local constable has ever accused you of being drunk even when you’re sober and he still takes you to jail even after you explain you just have land sickness and are trying to get your legs back under you, you belong here. OR if you still can’t walk a straight line even after not drinking for a week, you belong here.

You are a sailor if:

1. You are somewhere else in the world, have just touched dry land for the first time in a week and the first thing you did was head for a local pub. (Bar……..Pub……Ice chest or anywhere else you can drink…….Doesn't matter).
2. You watch the NOAA Website and plan your Pub Crawls around the High Pressure System pushing out that nasty low
3. You like to see your rail wet and ice cubes in your glass.
4. Your golf clubs are bent up and rusted so you’ve decided you’re selling them to pay for a new sail or a bottle of rum.
5. You stink of “spirits”.
6. You are leaving as soon as you can walk to sail somewhere else in the world.
7. You don’t make Sunday Dinner at your inlaws because you’re sunburned so bad you can’t wear clothes.
8. Your slip neighbor says..."Would you please quite throwing your empties in my boat."
9. You watch “Master and Commander, far side of the World” and you think..."That captain was a moron for not kicking that stupid cry baby doctor’s butt off his ship. Everyone knows that enough grog will cure anything. Why do you need a doctor on board?”
10. You watch “Wind” and think, “Those guys were idiots for building that boat so far away from a pub. Besides, everyone knows real sailors don’t belong in the desert!”
11. Someone yells “Throw me a line!” and you respond “There were two sailors stranded on a desert island……..

Last edited by NCountry; 07-24-2006 at 12:55 PM.
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