I took my better half out the other day. The winds were almost to the point of needing to reef. While I was wanting to let her heel over, my better half was pretty nervous. So, no big deal. I reduced sail. I have a fractional rig and a roller furler so it was easier for me to just roll up the jib than to reef.
Panic isn't fun for anyone and it's important to me that everyone is comfortable on my boat.
Remember: Happy wife, happy life.