Wow - not the sort of information I expected to get at all, but a lot more illuminating. Thanks!
Looks like I won't be getting an enhanced licence unless I convert to Canadian citizenship - permanent residency doesn't seem to cut it. Likewise, a Nexus card requires 3 years of residency within Canada before you can apply - hmm. Looks like the normal queue for me for now... (Note to self - get one of those fat passports)