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post #66 of Old 10-23-2012
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Re: can I afford to continue sailing

You have to have something, or some activity in your life, that is yours. If you don't you'll just end up hating your life and your wife anyway. A hundred bucks a month sounds like a lot, but most families blow much more than that on things you can't even remember at the end of the month. It is shocking to sit down and actually do a real budget. Most people discover that a huge percentage of their spending each month is on discretionary things, meaning not an actual bill or groceries.

I'm willing to bet your wife spends a damn site more than $1300 bucks a year on makeup, clothes, shoes, and handbags if she is any normal sort of woman. She'd blow a gasket if you told her she cannot spend any money without your approval.

For some insane reason, we men are raised under this notion that our job is to cave on every disagreement in an effort to keep the wife happy. It took me 15 years of marriage to learn that this approach creates a monster instead of a wife.

Before I gave up the boat I'd have her sit down with me and list every dollar we pay per month to prove that we can't afford the boat. If the money really isn't there, or your kids are doing without shoes- then the boat needs to go. In all likelihood, there is some meat on the bone in that budget. You can give up a little here and there to offset the boat cost.

A previous poster brought up Dave Ramsey. I am firmly in that camp. It took me way too many years to realize that it is truly amazing how much money you DON'T need when you have no debt. But I do not subscribe to the notion of living like an abject pauper to save every dime for retirement. You are one stroke or car crash away from losing every enjoyable boating day of your life. A fat retirement won't give you memories with your kids.
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