Books and videos are okay, but find a sailing buddy who would be willing to spend a couple hours on the water with you and your wife so that you both can gain the skill and confidence that will make sailing enjoyable for both of you. Very important that you understand the difference between tacking and gybing -- either of you getting clobbered by the boom as a result of an accidental gybe could end the day really badly. Okay to add a small motor, but as others will attest, in short order you won't need it. Two small paddles will be enough to get you back to shore if the wind dies on you. If you do add a small motor for matrimonial peace and harmony
, I would suggest buying used (check Craig's List) and then run it periodically to make certain it will start when you want or need it to. You *and* your wife should learn to sail and know how to start the motor. BTW, an electric trolling motor isn't likely to get you upwind to the dock/beach if the wind comes up to where you feel you can't handle the boat (and a deep cycle battery is very heavy and doesn't float). A better motor solution would be a small two-stroke gas engine with an integrated gas tank, but again, I don't think it's really necessary. Some time with an experienced sailor combined with practice will get back to the dock in any conditions.
Have fun and welcome to Sailnet. Lots of good advice here.