Thank you for all the great comments, I never expected such quick and well thought out replies! I will be leaving in February and so my search admittedly was a little limited as I don't have a lot of experience in this size of boat. I know that ideally one would take a year or two looking and narrowing down, but with my schedule, that is not really a possibility. We have a couple years to get out and do it before needing to be back. A friend has an IP42 and used to have a 38, that is where I started looking and though there are plenty of comments on their lack of 'speedy' sailing, I do like the fact that they are generally considered very safe, as 'chef2sail' said, tank-like. We are on a long cruise, so comfort and safety are top of the list, but it would be nice to get some speed as well. I sailed an IP35 this weekend and it certainly was a stable and solid boat, but it was a very light wind day and I can see where the comments about light-wind motoring come from, but like I said, definitely impressed with the quality of the boat. On Sunday I got on the Sabre and really enjoyed that as well, but that was a 34, and I'm sure quite a different boat than the 42 I saw online. The closest Sabre is a good 10 hour drive away, which is why getting some opinions is so helpful at this point.
I've tried to do a good bit of research online, and have read tons of advice on boats at certain price boats, but when I pull up the specs, many are not under 6' drafts and I am looking for a boat without a canoe stern, which knocks out a lot of the often-touted boats like the Valiant. Undeniably a great boat, and one of the most proven blue-water boats ever, just everyone has their opinions on visual appeal. I'm trying to stay around the 120k mark with another 20k for refits before going. If I can get it for less, even better.
Like I said, I think that ideally one would have more time to narrow things down, but with my situation I have tried to pick some boats that have a good reputation and also a fair number of examples that are for sale in that general price point. Again, thank you all for your thoughts, they are all very helpful!