Aspects of cruising - Page 3 - SailNet Community

   Search Sailnet:

 forums  store  


Quick Menu
Forums           
Articles          
Galleries        
Boat Reviews  
Classifieds     
Search SailNet 
Boat Search (new)

Shop the
SailNet Store
Anchor Locker
Boatbuilding & Repair
Charts
Clothing
Electrical
Electronics
Engine
Hatches and Portlights
Interior And Galley
Maintenance
Marine Electronics
Navigation
Other Items
Plumbing and Pumps
Rigging
Safety
Sailing Hardware
Trailer & Watersports
Clearance Items

Advertise Here






Go Back   SailNet Community > Out There > Cruising & Liveaboard Forum
 Not a Member? 


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
  #21  
Old 09-15-2009
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Anacortes, WA
Posts: 297
Thanks: 6
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Rep Power: 9
dave6330 is on a distinguished road
Dan,

I too have a dream of sailing away but I couldn't (and wouldn't) imagine doing so without the willing support, help and companionship of my wife. Sailing started out as MY dream but as the years have gone by, SHE is possibly even more passionate about it than I am. During our recent crossing of the Gulf of Alaska, she stood her own watches at the helm alone and WE are better (far better) for the experience. NOW we KNOW that cruising is not only possible for us, but something we can ENJOY together.

Luck to you and yours.

Dave
__________________
[/SIGPIC]Dave
Sailing out of Seward, Alaska

"Fight the good fight, holding on to faith and a good conscience. Some have rejected these and so have shipwrecked thier faith"
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #22  
Old 09-15-2009
Cruisingdad's Avatar
Best Looking MALE Mod
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Washington State
Posts: 9,904
Thanks: 3
Thanked 107 Times in 53 Posts
Rep Power: 10
Cruisingdad is a jewel in the rough Cruisingdad is a jewel in the rough Cruisingdad is a jewel in the rough
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cobra160 View Post
Thank you for all the help, I do however think that after 30 years of marriage I know my wife better than you do. Especially since you have never met her.

I have gone through training with her as a ski patroller (This is an EMT on the hill) so to speak. I passed first time with out so much as a hiccup. I helped her through the next two years (Lots of crying on her part). As a husband I thought they were too hard on her, but others seethings that I did not. indecision was more than likely one of them. She went through flight ground school with my daughter and had a good time at that but again that is book work. Not a problem for her at all. Many have said before that the husband should not teach the wife. Yet I know my wife better than someone else and can teach her far better than some stranger. I instruct for flying, golf, skiing, snowboarding, and many other things that people would like to learn to do. I have taught her how to do many things. You are still under the assumption that she even wants to learn (Or take the class). We were going to take diving lessons while in Hawaii but she decided at the last minute that she would not be able to pass and we had to drop the plans.

Believe me when I say I do not want to do this for a vacation. I would much rather sell everything I own and live where the wind blows me. I know to you I sound conceded. I will tell you a little story so as maybe to help.

I was coming off back surgery and needed some help or something. Something medical I think it was. My daughter (really my daughter in law but after my son died we adopted her as she had no other family) was over to her friends house. I had called over to talk to her and the friend just suggested that I ask Cindy (Wife) I laughed and said yeah right. The friend was about to say "that was not nice" until my daughter said the same thing.
Some people just do not have the ability or desire to learn certain things. This is a nurse that if you ask her what to do in an emergency situation or just general medical situation will say "Don't ask me".

I know to you I sound like a blow hard but you do not know me or my wife. I think a benefit of doubt is in order. At least until you get to know me.

If I had to describe my self so someone would understand me it would be; I would live up in Alaska on a uninhabited lake in a cabin I built. I would do this with little or no supplies. Just the tools I would need to survive. I would be happy doing this. If I would describe Cindy a tent would not be her first choice, Cancun would top her list, condo on the beach. Not just sitting around though, she is very active. Tennis, golf, volley ball, dancing. Sitting around she does not do. She is just not the person that is going to grab the sheet in an emergency. She will just sit there and look at it. If you tell her to grab it she will. She is not the person who will get out of the car and help at a car accident, she will call 911 though. As long as she does not have to make any decisions she is fine. I can plan a whole trip and as long as I have fun things for her to do we will be fine.

You are right about one thing I am a control person. Everyone was shocked when I got my pilots license. They all thought I was afraid to fly because I did not. I said I was not afraid to fly, I was afraid to have someone else fly me. This is why we get along so well, I like to control and she does not. Something as simple as calling the taxi after we land while I'm securing the plane. It will not happen.

Those typical lesser duties like cooking and cleaning will be done by me. (Hold this heading while I go make us some supper).

One last thing, I am not telling her she cannot take lessons she just will not. She will love to go along while I take lessons though.

Dan
What kind of money are you proposing for your boat? I would probably not opt for something under 35. I feel that your wife in particular will want something nice and comfortable (and maybe a bit luxurious). Regardless of whether she particpates, learns to sail, commands the boat, or whatever, if momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. So get something so that it will fit her lifestyle as much as yours.

I single all the time while Kris takes care of the kids. Difference being that she knows the boat really well and can get here-there without me. If you can tell her what to do (hold this course, using your example), you will be fine most of the time. Outfit the boat for a single-hand, with items like autopilot, radar, chartplotter, etc.

Also, as you ahve grandkids, should you want to maintain a shoreside connection, get an SSB with sailmail. That is a long discussion, but remember that on the water, you lose VHF and mobile phone ability about 20 nm offshore (depending on your area).

You can plan on her not participating, but you might just find she really gets into this and becomes very intersted in it. If not, at least having the company will be good for you (assuming you keep her comfortable).

If you can give some idea of budget, etc, maybe we can help give you our opinions on a boat that might be suitable.

- CD
__________________
Sailnet Moderator



1987 Tayana Vancouver 42, Credendo Vides, (Mom and Pops boat, F/T Mobile Live Aboards in Puget Sound)

My Website:
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Follow My Blog at:
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Follow me on Facebook:

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #23  
Old 09-15-2009
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: WI
Posts: 32
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Rep Power: 0
Cobra160 is on a distinguished road
As it stands right now I have a Bellanca Viking 4 place plane. This is a fast get there type of plane retractable gear. It is worth around 40,000.00 I am going to first try and trade it to someone who is sailing but is tired of it and wants something new. I get the best deal this way, it has worked for me in the past. Failing that I can just sell it and buy a boat. I still have another plane that is not worth as much but may be easier to sell. One of those LSA types that are all the rage. Either way I would look for something that needs some work. I would rather have a better boat that needs work than a not so good boat that is ready to sail. I like setting things up the way I want them and this works better if you are not throwing new stuff away.

This should not be that hard to understand. It is not that I plan on her not helping. It is that I am not going to depend on it. This is two different things. In the airplane world Pilot needed vs Pilot and co-pilot needed.

We live right by Lake Superior so we will most likely start there. I do have a 26' (Like a Catalina) that I could start out on. But it is more of a camper than a motorhome. By the way we did a lot of motor-homing raising the kids, not the big 48' ones either.

I ordered three books that should be here in a few days all by the same author. 25 best small boats or something like that and things you should know before it's too late or something like that. It is on another thread.

I looked into sailboats earlier in my life when I really wanted to sail to the UK for retirement. I was looking at Bristal's I think it was. Good looking older boats, full keel. I learned to use the interent boards to find out more info. This was not available back then. I also learned that there are so many things that you do not think of when getting into something new. Buying a plane is the easy part. I went from no pilots license to airplane mechanic just to stay in the air.

Dan
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #24  
Old 09-15-2009
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: WI
Posts: 32
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Rep Power: 0
Cobra160 is on a distinguished road
Quote:
Originally Posted by MMR View Post
Figure an average boat speed (through the water) of 6 kts/hr (that's generous). Figure the gulf stream is pushing you NORTH an avg of 3 kt/hr.

ASSUME beautiful weather, no storms, wind in your favor.

You're looking at aprox 10 hrs travel time.

When you travel on a boat, cruising, plan in terms of DAYS of travel, not HOURS.

Whole different ball game. Read some blogs of folks who are doing it to get a sense of the parameters and level of effort.
WI to FL 1100 miles give or take. 14 hrs in a 172. 11 in the Cherokee six around 18 hrs in a 150. Days not hrs, this is not counting the stop-overs because of weather. I have done it in all three planes. Each one was different. Each one had to be planned different. In a plane you have to figure in the wind because you are flying in it. If it is going against you you loose that much speed regardless how fast the instrument says you are going. On the second trip in the 150 I delivered to FL I was going 35 mph over the ground at some points. You sit in a 150 for 18 hrs then tell me you would not rather be on a 35' boat. Getting there is half the fun.

Dan
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #25  
Old 09-15-2009
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: WI
Posts: 32
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Rep Power: 0
Cobra160 is on a distinguished road
Quote:
Originally Posted by saildork View Post
Dan,

Appreciate your response and the history. I share your dream of sailing/cruising as a lifestyle, living on the boat, visiting new and different places.... It can be idyllic, I'm sure. And I give you the benefit of the doubt on knowing your wife. I did not want to imply otherwise.

Reading through your posts, I can tell that the cruising life is your dream, but I can't tell if it is Cindy's dream. Is she committed to this idea or is she going along without knowing what it will really mean to go out on the big blue in a small boat? Or is she resistant to the idea?

If you sail off by yourself, at least you only have you and the boat to worry about. With a non-participating passenger, you are now responsible for all 3 of you. And if one of you becomes unable to function, you could be in serious trouble. If she goes along for the ride, but doesn't really want to be there, any problems (relationally, physically, technically, any) will be magnified tremendously just by the fact that you are out there, surrounded by water, 24/7, with the nearest land being directly below your boat. I wouldn't want anyone to be in that situation.

I don't know... it just sounds to me like your plan has a high probability of failure, and a low probability of success as currently envisioned. Just my opinion.

Pat
A little more history then,

When I got my pilot license I did not ask her if she wanted to go flying I wanted to learn to fly. Our first trip was to visit her mother not far 170 miles took 3/4 hr. Second trip was to FL I think 3rd to NH over Niagara Falls. She had said once after words something to the tune of "I sure do a lot of fun things with you". Boggles her mind that someone can do so many things. She had no dream of flying before we started. Now she said, You are not going to sell the plane are you? "Well, yes dear but I have others". And I can always build another one.

Side note; her mother had never been out of Jackson County WI until I met her. We took her to the edges of the US. She saw things that she never would have seen. I doubt she would have ever got out of Jackson County. Was this her dream, I doubt it. Did she have a good time, I know she did. I have pictures of her in a swimming pool in Nashville Hanging on the wall in her living room. Each time she sees it she says I cannot believe I did that with a big smile on her face. Picture an old lady in a rocking chair then picture her walking across a covered bridge in Vermont. We took her to Ellis Island to see where her mother came through. She has been to Disneyland and Disneyworld. Yellowstone and Yosemite. The Grand Canyon. San Francisco. How many grandmas dream of sitting in a bar at Cheers in Boston and having a drink.

If Cindy does not like it an airline ticket will get her back home from almost anywhere. She has followed me all over the US and had a great time so far. I see nothing that should change that.

Dan
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #26  
Old 09-16-2009
Cruisingdad's Avatar
Best Looking MALE Mod
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Washington State
Posts: 9,904
Thanks: 3
Thanked 107 Times in 53 Posts
Rep Power: 10
Cruisingdad is a jewel in the rough Cruisingdad is a jewel in the rough Cruisingdad is a jewel in the rough
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cobra160 View Post
As it stands right now I have a Bellanca Viking 4 place plane. This is a fast get there type of plane retractable gear. It is worth around 40,000.00 I am going to first try and trade it to someone who is sailing but is tired of it and wants something new. I get the best deal this way, it has worked for me in the past. Failing that I can just sell it and buy a boat. I still have another plane that is not worth as much but may be easier to sell. One of those LSA types that are all the rage. Either way I would look for something that needs some work. I would rather have a better boat that needs work than a not so good boat that is ready to sail. I like setting things up the way I want them and this works better if you are not throwing new stuff away.

This should not be that hard to understand. It is not that I plan on her not helping. It is that I am not going to depend on it. This is two different things. In the airplane world Pilot needed vs Pilot and co-pilot needed.

We live right by Lake Superior so we will most likely start there. I do have a 26' (Like a Catalina) that I could start out on. But it is more of a camper than a motorhome. By the way we did a lot of motor-homing raising the kids, not the big 48' ones either.

I ordered three books that should be here in a few days all by the same author. 25 best small boats or something like that and things you should know before it's too late or something like that. It is on another thread.

I looked into sailboats earlier in my life when I really wanted to sail to the UK for retirement. I was looking at Bristal's I think it was. Good looking older boats, full keel. I learned to use the interent boards to find out more info. This was not available back then. I also learned that there are so many things that you do not think of when getting into something new. Buying a plane is the easy part. I went from no pilots license to airplane mechanic just to stay in the air.

Dan
Dan, this should not be too hard to understand either, but I am not questioning how you will deal with your wife. You know your wife better than anyone. I was merely mentioning that she may come to love sailing. Many spouses do. I said this as some hope of encouragement to you, not questioning your relationship. The realtionship between you and your spouse is your business.

Your original questions about what it is like as a live aboard is pretty cut and dry: it is what you make of it. It is not easy, but can be beautiful or it can really suck. If you have lived aboard in a motor home, you will be somewhat accustomed to the lifestyle, but the distinct difference is that you can hop off your motor home and take a walk. That is a lot more diofficult on a boat for obvious reasons. Also, when your motor home has a problem, you can stop and fix it. Those same issues can be serious if not fatal on a boat.

$40,000 will limit your boat selection. You said that you would "rather have a better boat that needs work than a worse boat that is ready to sail". I am not sure I understand that sentence. The better boat will be ready to sail, the worse boat will be unseaworthy or need a lot of elbow grease to make it a good liveabaord. You do sound like the type of person that is not afraid to get your hands dirty (and probably enjoys it), but remember that like airplanes, boats have very specific ways of doing things for safety of vessel and crew. I would compare working on a boat much more to working on an airplane than a house or motor home.

My suggestion about the boat purchase was that since you are staying what appears to be fairly coastal, buy a boat that is comfortable and you and your wife would enjoy. I would also urge you to spend more money on buying a boat that is in great shape and taken very good care of than spending less money on a boat that needs a lot of work. I would guess that like an airplane, getting a good foundation is imperative. Don't worry, you could buy a brand new boat and still spend countless hours working on her getting her ready.

I hope some of this helps.

- CD
__________________
Sailnet Moderator



1987 Tayana Vancouver 42, Credendo Vides, (Mom and Pops boat, F/T Mobile Live Aboards in Puget Sound)

My Website:
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Follow My Blog at:
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


Follow me on Facebook:

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #27  
Old 09-16-2009
mccary's Avatar
Aeolus II
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Gaithersburg, MD
Posts: 670
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Rep Power: 13
mccary is on a distinguished road
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cobra160 View Post
If I have to rely on my wife at sea I might as well put a gun to my head right now.

Dan
I feel so sorry for you Dan. My wife is as competent sailor as I am. Sure, she doesn't have the strength I have, but she is capable at sailing the boat. She is half the reason I enjoy sailing so much.
__________________
Joe McCary,
Sailing on The Central Chesapeake Bay, West River, MD on my Catalina 27, Aelous II with my wife and friends.
Sailing Blog:
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #28  
Old 09-16-2009
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: WI
Posts: 32
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Rep Power: 0
Cobra160 is on a distinguished road
Thanks CD,

My comment about the boat was just about as you described it. A better base to start with is better than a sailing boat that will never be a solid performer even with more work.

You may not be able to get out and walk, but no reason you cannot get out and swim. Now in a plane you have little choice unless you have a chute. Keep in mind 8 hrs in a plane shoulder to shoulder. 8 hrs in a boat I'll be up on deck, I'll be down below, I'll go for a swim, I'm going to row the rest of the way.

I have learned so far to look for a boat with less space up on deck and more space down below? In other words not a six person sit up on deck looking at the waves kinda boat. More of a single or double cockpit. Large holding tanks for waste, water, and fuel.

By the way mention to a pilot friend you want to go 1000 miles in a 150 with another person. He will tell you no way you can do it.

Dan
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #29  
Old 09-16-2009
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: WI
Posts: 32
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Rep Power: 0
Cobra160 is on a distinguished road
Quote:
Originally Posted by mccary View Post
I feel so sorry for you Dan. My wife is as competent sailor as I am. Sure, she doesn't have the strength I have, but she is capable at sailing the boat. She is half the reason I enjoy sailing so much.
Don't feel sorry for me, plenty of other people out there to feel sorry for. I have it great, I have a wife that does not complain too much, likes to do almost everything I do. Will let me do anything I want to try. If she doesn't to want to try something she has no problem letting me go a head and do it anyway. I give up very little to be with her. My best friend HAD a wife that you could depend on to get you out of the soup if needed. He was miserable, she was strong willed and wanted to do things her way, he was just as strong willed and wanted things his way. The thing you guys are not understanding is that I am happy and plenty satisfied. It works great for me and it works great for her. I like being in charge, she does not. What more can you ask for.

Saying I would not have any fun or would not like the trip with my wife is like saying that I would not like the same trip with my six year old granddaughter. I would like the trip with her even more, I love to show kids new things. Ever taken a kid flying and let them take the yoke. Priceless! Yet you cannot count on them getting you down if something went wrong. All you can do is plan for the best outcome. I am not planning on racing around the world where you have to go or else. I will most likely be within days of a port. I have capabilities to just call in the guard if needed.

Dan
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
  #30  
Old 09-16-2009
GeorgeB's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Alameda, San Francisco Bay
Posts: 1,503
Thanks: 1
Thanked 36 Times in 35 Posts
Rep Power: 10
GeorgeB is on a distinguished road
Cobra, how about a little more detail about your plans and less of the airplane analogies? What really are your requirements? Is it under 36 feet (to get the cost break in the ?). Do you want to be able to sail seven days (one week) before land falls or is it between ports (for replenishment). Here in BahamasCalifornia, $40K is only going to get you an older, mid thirty foot boat that will need at least another $20K or so to get it cruise able. Most people out here sell their houses in order to buy a cruiser. My wife is fond of saying that the boat shrinks a foot for every week you are aboard. When we sail up and down the coast, our forward and aft cabins pretty much become unusable as living spaces and we hot bunk in the sea berths in the main saloon. Once in harbor, we shift gear around and make the boat much more comfortable. Getting out and swimming around the boat at sea makes about as much sense as stepping out of your airplane without a parachute Ė you may want to rethink the idea of your wife not being able to sail the boat so she can rescue you and save your life. Most cruisers spend more days in harbor than they do sailing so donít discount larger cockpits and more comfortable cabins. There is a reason that catamarans are so popular in the Caribbean. Last year on the way to Hawaii, we used a little more than a gallon per person per day of water. This is really tight and you should consider 2-2 Ĺ gallons per person per day in the tropics. Multiply by crew size and number of days between replenishing and you can figure out your desired tank sizes. Donít worry about waste tank sizes Ė that is more important in the USA. You will be pumping over the side while at sea.
Reply With Quote Share with Facebook
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

 
Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may post attachments
You may edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Retirement Cruising Budgets Randy Harman Cruising Articles 0 05-12-2004 08:00 PM
Calculating the Cost of Cruising Paul & Sheryl Shard Cruising Articles 0 04-03-2003 07:00 PM
Calculating the Cost of Cruising Paul & Sheryl Shard Her Sailnet Articles 0 04-03-2003 07:00 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:18 AM.

Add to My Yahoo!         
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
SEO by vBSEO 3.6.1
(c) Marine.com LLC 2000-2012

The SailNet.com store is owned and operated by a company independent of the SailNet.com forum. You are now leaving the SailNet forum. Click OK to continue or Cancel to return to the SailNet forum.