Andrew, no need to apologize. Old guys like me go on a rampage every once in a while, mainly because we're old and crazy, which is not all that bad, though.
After living aboard for 6 months, I know that I could live fairly well on just $500 a month if I lived on the hook someplace where it's relatively warm. Of course, when your health goes to Hell in a handbasket, which mine has during the past few months, that $500 won't go very far. I went to a pulmonary doctor a couple days ago, and just the tests he conducted on my lungs cost a little over $3,000 and only took 30 minutes to complete. And, a medication he gave me samples of cost $300 for a 20-day supply.
So, part of the equation of living aboard on $500 is remaining healthy till the day you die. Then if your friends want to see your smiling face looking up at them from a casket, add another $10,000 to $15,000 for the one day viewing and funeral. Of course, you could have your boney butt incinerated to dust for about $800 to $1,200, and have your friends dump the ashes in the open ocean. Can't dump them in Chesapeake Bay unless you get a hazardous waste permit! Can't even dump em in the back yard - legally.
The main reason I didn't stay on a mooring ball, or on the hook, which cost far less than a mooring ball, was I needed to move my music gear to and from the boat in a safe manner. Moving 250-pounds of music equipment, all of which is expensive electronics, in a 10-foot, inflatable dinghy is out of the question. Therefore, I opted to spend the extra bucks and tie up to the marina bulkhead, which was level with my deck. The cost, though, was outrageous, which is usually the case in tropical resort areas. $750 a month, plus electricity blows the Hell out of that $500 a month budget. However, with the music gear, I was able to recover the cost of dockage with just 2 to 3 days of playing at the local bars and restaurants.
Sue wish I were back there right now,