Wife won't retire with me.... - SailNet Community

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  #1  
Old 05-06-2014
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Wife won't retire with me....

I figure I have about 20 years left before I want to hang it all up and the way I spend the only "retirement" I will be able to afford is one with little to no tax
I can't get her to buy in to the concept of a 36-45 footer to live aboard in RI during the summer and take down to FLA for the cooler weather. It seems like the most econimical way to retire to me.

The reason for this post is to get some opinions of those that already do that to some extent and is it as economical as it seems from a desk chair.

What say you...
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Old 05-06-2014
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

Here is a novel concept: ask your wife what she would like to do in retirement! Where would she like to live? What would she like to do?

Treat your wife the way you would like to be treated and communicate your wishes as well, so the two of you can discuss and negotiate, instead of reacting to one parties' demands and expectations.

Every weekend I practice this by asking my wife what she would like to do on Saturday and Sunday. I also tell her what I would like to do. Then we discuss and compromise. I also remember that I want her to be happy...

After all, if your wife is not happy, you will not be happy. This much you learn as a divorce lawyer.

Last edited by jameswilson29; 05-06-2014 at 09:30 AM.
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Old 05-06-2014
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

My title was more "tongue in cheek" than looking for marital advice...LOL. I was just throwing it out there to see what it really costs to be a snowbird.

I have been married for 29 years but you never know it all


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Old 05-06-2014
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

You would be surprised, then, to see how many marriages end with the empty nest syndrome. They stayed together for the sake of the kids. Now, the youngest goes to college. The two of them look at each other and decide that is not what each wants to see for the rest of their remaining lives. It happens...

Those are the toughest divorces, because they have to divide a lifetime of accumulated property and/or debt and settle support when one party might have stayed home to take care of the kids and household. To the outside world, they looked like they would stay together til death. Lots of resentment and difficulty there.

I wish you luck if there is any truth in your post.
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Last edited by jameswilson29; 05-06-2014 at 10:04 AM.
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Old 05-06-2014
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

My wife will not let me retire! Well, that's not true. She said I could retire three days after I'm dead.

Her idea of retirement is traveling throughout the country, visiting friends in other states, and me doing all the driving. This coming January she will get a dose of what this actually entails and just how expensive this can be in comparison to cruising. In six months of cruising, total cost, food, fuel, booze, marina fees, restaurants, repairs, I spent, on average, less than $1,200 a month. The cost of renting a house in the south Florida Keys is that much a week.

Good luck,

Gary
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Old 05-06-2014
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

I have two boats. Actually three. One I keep here in Ohio on a trailer and a Catalina 27 and a Hunter 34 in Oak Harbor, Washington. My wife does NOT sail. I retired a few years back and she retired a couple of years ahead of me. I couldn't get her to move to the PNW so I told her; "That's fine. You can stay here in Ohio but I'm going to spend part of the year sailing in what I consider to be a sailor's paradise." She visits me a couple of times while I'm where I love to be and I spend part of the year where she likes to be. I usually spend three to four months at a time on board. So far has worked for us over the last four years. But I sure do miss my dog while I'm gone!
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

Why does this lifestyle mean no tax to you?

Your income is still taxable, your boat is likely to be subject to property tax in many states...

Try this: for the next 20 years until you are ready to hang it all up, max out your contributions to your retirement account and live frugally. You might even find that you are financially ready to go in 10 years.

My best advice for living frugally? Find a plan that you can both be on board with. Our plan has changed several times, but since we were both on board with each of the plans, it was easy to limit how often we eat out and make other delayed gratification choices.
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Old 05-06-2014
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

Quote:
Originally Posted by blutoyz View Post

The reason for this post is to get some opinions of those that already do that to some extent and is it as economical as it seems from a desk chair.

What say you...
My recommendation to forget about getting a real answer on a forum to this question. All that is going to happen is the same old division between the same old players on how much it will cost.


You are much better searching for blogs for boats and people doing similar to what you feel you want to do. Then either reading though it looking for cost info or contacting the owners and asking the question.

Far as the wife question, only your wife can answer.
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Old 05-06-2014
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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

See if you can get her fired, then she has to retire with you.

What it costs is completely dependent on the people involved. I cruised for over 4 months on less than $500/month, but that's not for everybody. In fact, it's not even for me now...

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Re: Wife won't retire with me....

My wife doesn't like to sail but that's ok I sail were I want to go and she will fly in and join me. At least that is the plan now, subject to change without notice.
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