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Go Back   SailNet Community > General Interest > General Discussion (sailing related)
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  #21  
Old 07-03-2007
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Here are the things I have put down to cover. They are in no particulair order. Please send me more:

1) Boat selection.
2) What it is like.
3) Setting up the boat.
4) Activities aboard and off.
5) Gear.
6) Provisioning.
7) Education
8) Safety and rules.
9) Medicines and first aid afloat.
10) The Return to land life and how kids re-integrate into society.
11) (Per Melanie Neale) What Happens to Cruising Kids when they Grow up.
12) Peer influence/social influence
13) Ideal age
14) Surviving together in 30-40 feet.
15) Health and medical insurance
16) Explaining to family members and friends why you are going and the cruising life in general.

What else?

- CD

PS I am putting these together in an ever expanding list. I am taking the input from Sialia and Giu and the many others that have responded here and have asked questions in the past. THere will be topics here that I CANNOT answer. That will be the fun of it. It will be kind of a group project.
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Last edited by Cruisingdad; 07-05-2007 at 11:23 AM.
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  #22  
Old 07-03-2007
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CD,

More to the point for me, how do I make Mom happy while cruising? I believe that I can make the kids happy most of the time, using the great advice given so far among other tactics. What worries me is my wife, who is on board with the concept of cruising with the kids, but is subject to boredom and doesn't sit still that well. Having a decent boat would help (I'm working on that part!), and going interesting places that are fairly short in distance, at least to start. Any other thoughts about the marriage and Mom's well being while cruising would be great.

Thanks,
Freeman
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  #23  
Old 07-03-2007
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From what I can see from a scan of the posts is that they are geared toward young children. We first took our daughter on the boat at 3 mos and she's been on the water ever since. In our experience, young kids are relatively easy to have since they're so self contained. Just take their toys, crayons, pencils, a stack of paper, a bucket, a kite, a movie or 2, and they're happy anywhere.

The problem is that they grow up! We've been VERY liberal with bringing our daughter's friends along with us and we've found that they entertain each other. A day that could/would have been spent with a sour attitude was brightened and more fun for everyone on board. Our daughter is now 13 and I can see a day when she'll not want to come on a two week trip unless a boy is involved (No way! says Dad). I kind of recall a time when I was that age and I balked at sailing, but have apparently gotten over it.

Does anyone have experience sailing with teens? Especially girls? She really isn't interested in the boat's operation (maybe it's just a guy thing). But is competent when asked to tie a line, fend off, etc.... so I guess that she's learned a thing or two.
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  #24  
Old 07-03-2007
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Bardo/Freeman,

I will try and include some thoughts to that under surviving in 30-40 feet!!!!

- CD
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  #25  
Old 07-03-2007
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I just thought of another: Punishment afloat/effective lashing techniques.
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  #26  
Old 07-03-2007
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SH,

That is called standing watch.
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  #27  
Old 07-03-2007
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Giulietta is just really nice Giulietta is just really nice Giulietta is just really nice Giulietta is just really nice Giulietta is just really nice
I think I really have to say something its bugging me for a while, (sorry guys) I think it is absolutely cruelty to go out and sail for years in a row with a kid of 4, 5 6 or 7 years old, or even 2 or three. I see sometimes the people that go around the world with a young kid onbord, as they stop here, it makes me so sad...sorry...I can't understand how can those parents be so selfish to the point of sacrificing the childhood of their kids, just to satisfy their personal selfish whims of freedom and World curiosity....the kids grow up to be starngers to the things of life...good made man and girls, but I don't know....

I see the kids....the ones in the crusing boats that stop here...they look like sad kids to me, Have'nt seen one that "looks normal" or happy. Sometimes my son Fred goes out and tries to play with them at the marina...THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY, PEOPLE!!!!! Its not one or two or three, its at least 4 boats a month that stop here....the kids look like strangers, they lack contact with other kids..its so sad. Please note I know the contact with Mum and dad all day long is important, BUT ITS NOT BALANCED, no matter how you try...its not enough, we are not humans to be brought up like that....

Those years are so important for the making and building of the life character and personality of a child, the comunication with other kids their age, the human interaction besides the Mum and Dad. I know the mum and Dad being there is important, but the Grandma, the school plays, the soccer team, the little play friend, the movies, Barney....the other things that are not available to the kid because the parents decided to go around the world...( I am not talking about those that live on a boat, but in one place and kids get to go to school like it is normal...I'm talking about the sea gypsies....

I don't know, no matter how much I like sailing, I would never impose living on a boat and sail around (unless I had no other option) to my kids, that would be presuming on a friendship...I don't do that...my kids are worth more than my desires to sail to Madagascar....

Want to cruise around the world with kids?? do it during the school holidays, send the kids to school as its normal, let them live their life, give them that chance...sometimes I am away from my kids, maybe I cherish them more because of that then the dad that sees his kids every day...maybe....

Want to cruise all in one go??? GO ALONE...OR DON'T HAVE KIDS!!!!!

Its cruel.....very cruel...

Sorry I spoke my mind, and I know I will get tortured here...I don't care....I am the one that sees the kids around here...the poor litlle bastards to whom a World cruise is imposed to satisfy the selfish whims of their parents....and nothing was asked...

I see their eyes, folks...I see their eyes......
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  #28  
Old 07-03-2007
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my son is 9, his so called "room" is a quarter berth. i guess he's at a stage where he needs his privacy so he requested we fabricate a curtain to isolate him from the rest of the boat. i installed 12v lighting, a 12v power jack and CD/DVD, video game wooden storage crates secured to the hull with locktight powergrab...ahhhh, peace at last.
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  #29  
Old 07-03-2007
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Giu,

You bring up another thing to be discussed, which I think should be touched on here. I have heard that many, many, many times.

That is why, in my opinion, you cruise - for the kids too. We have no aspirations of circling the globe. But cruising boats with kids find one another and hang out together. That ended up being the case for us. Some of our best friends in the world were on a stink-pot behind us. They have 2 girls, both the same ages as Glen and Chase, and would do anything for us and we would do anything for them. 1300 miles away, they are still our closest friends.

Maybe what you see are the parents that are going to sail around the world, come hell or high water? Maybe to them it is the trip that is important, not the inbetween? To those children, they would have the same look no matter if by boat or RV or minivan on its way to the soccer game.

I will tell you that Melanie Neale LOVED it and when I spoke to her last week she said that she wants her children to do it. I have heard that from many other people that cruised and have grown up now. That is what I strive for.

I am not some anti-socialite, Giu. You know me. In fact, my wife calls me the mayor because everytime I get into a new harbor, I get all the cruisers to gether for drinks or a cookout! I enjoy people and some aspects of society.

However, I do not buy the goverments and societies views on how we should raise our children or what they think is normal. Shopping malls, play stations, and television is not normal. It is something that could be good in moderation, but we have molested and corrupted our perceptions into believing it is normal.

The kids I see here, especailly in the cities, are not happy. Mom and dad work just to make ends meet. Dad gets home late if at all. Weekends are a rush to finish the chores. THe lawn is mowed by immigrants. THe house is cleaned by immigrants. Restaurants cook more meals than the stove at home. Salad comes from a bag, home cooked meals from a can. And the education is a racial, political abomination of government standards for medicoricy.

There was a thread a while back that said the days of Leave it to Beaver are gone and forgotten. They are not for me. My kids are close (but fight, that is normal). Me and the kids roll around in the floor and wrestle. We read books together. We go sailing together. We watch sunsets together. I plan on making the most of those years when they are close to mom and dad. The day will come, I am afraid, that they will want to distance themselves from us and find members of the opposite sex on their road to adulthood. If they want to cruise then, we will cruise. If not, we will not and will re-integrate into "society".

Until then, I hope to take them back out to see the world together. Do you realize how very, very lucky we are to get the chance to do this? Do you realize how very, very rare it is? We will seek out other cruising boats with kids and we will travel with my parents who are going cruising with us. In that way, I guess we are different than the boats you mentioned above. However, I want my children to see the world and experience different cultures and different places. I want them to enjoy it and look back on it as the best years of their lives. The only thing less acceptable than the "kids that don't look normal" is not to try at all.

In all things in life, whether the slums, the cities, the country or the sailboat, it is the parents that make the difference. Children will seek influences at these ages and what they experience and learn here will mold them into the men or women that they will become. I want that influence to be mine, and not a shopping mall or a television. I want it to be nature and the beautiful things the world holds outside of miles of concrete where no life can exist.

You have to understand my Friend, what I see, repeatedly, are the parents that dump their kids off at T-Ball, or soccer games, or the mall, or the movies. They don't do it because it makes their kids normal, they do it because they don't care: free baby sitting. Is it because they do not love their children? Is it because they are worn out from the week before and need a break? Is it because the perceive it as normal? Who cares? The child does not. The end result is the same - we become a race (not just Americans) that have forgotten the importance of family. Such has our society become. And we wonder why children have the problems they do when they grow up.

Where I go and how I plan to do it is not "normal". But is that truly a bad thing? My children, my family, are my life. I have a true passion for cruising, and nature, and the ocean. I will share that passion with them. And should they become complacent or tired of it, then we will follow whatever trail makes them the most happy. If it is by boat, it is by boat. If it is by RV, it is by RV. If it is a house in the suburbs, it is a house in the suburbs.

But to the sea we will go. I truly hope to do it right.
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  #30  
Old 07-03-2007
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Thanks CD for that heartfelt response.

It constantly amazes me how parents don't question the "normal" practices and just consume parenting like everything else. I think one of the hardest things we can do as parents is to be conscious parents; if that means parenting on the sea or suburbia, that's grand. Just make sure you choose, don't follow the lead put forth by your neighbors.
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