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13-year-old Laura Dekker around the world

33K views 230 replies 67 participants last post by  hellosailor 
#1 ·
#35 ·
Wow Tom, congrats to your daughter. That's cool. She was in ballet right?

My wife is homeschooling our kids and they are loving it. It just seemed weird to me to think about a kid doing it him/herself based on my own dislike for school when I was a kid. Had it been up to me, I would have seriously blown it all off!!
 
#49 ·
My wife is homeschooling our kids and they are loving it. It just seemed weird to me to think about a kid doing it him/herself based on my own dislike for school when I was a kid. Had it been up to me, I would have seriously blown it all off!!
Different kids different attitudes. We home schooled our daughter through 11th grade.
She would read a giant unabridged Shakespeare book we had for hours and hours completely on her own laughing hysterically at the funny parts of the comedies.
She was definitely capable of home-schooling herself from the age of about 10 up.
Some argue that the situation in school where the classroom work is either too easy, too hard, restricted to memorizing stuff for a standard test, waiting for other students to be disciplined and all the other bad stuff that happens in some classrooms is the reason many students blow off learning.

So now my daughter has just finished her teacher certification classes and just has to do the student teaching for a couple of semesters and she will be looking for a job in her chosen profession.
Grade school teacher.

Go figure Kids huh!!!
 
#36 ·
Hi smackdaddy,

Thanks for asking. Raised in the Netherlands, traveled around the world in North-, Central- and South America, Europe, Sri Lanka, Vietnam, China, Australia and big parts of Africa and living in the Dutch Antilles for almost 15 years were we got our kids 6 and 8 years old I’m still Dutch but at a distant. I followed Zac from the beginning and like to see many more youngsters doing things we perhaps also liked when we were young. When I heart of Laura I also followed this story. Because it got so much media attention already in the Netherlands Authorities had to do something. We have laws for school going kids, and as I read the posts here, there are laws and rules in the USA as well. Perhaps even more. But different countries with different rules with same intentions. Even New Zeeland probably won’t let her go.
Holland is a very small country and we are not used to home-schooling. I heart of home-schooling on Dutch cruisers around the world, but than with parents on board. My opinion on this is that a girl with so many tasks to do, she has no time for doing home-schooling. Internet at sea? And then the physical part. Is she strong enough? And can she do the many technical parts. She has been held in England. How will other countries (Authorities) react and will she not been abused by rough harbour people, Fishermen at sea etc. with the wrong intentions.

Nature can be harsh and people violent especially for a lonely 13 year old girl without supervision. The world isn’t (always) nice.

If it was my girl I say NO. Not for the honour to be the first and youngest. If she likes the sailing and adventure, then why not with her father?

I like to see her go. But she has to follow the rules and mostly I like to see her safe!
 
#136 ·
At the end of the day, the point of view I take most seriously in all this is the OP's, PeirreMundo. The dude is, after all, Dutch.

Hi smackdaddy,

Thanks for asking. Raised in the Netherlands, traveled around the world in North-, Central- and South America, Europe, Sri Lanka, Vietnam, China, Australia and big parts of Africa and living in the Dutch Antilles for almost 15 years were we got our kids 6 and 8 years old I'm still Dutch but at a distant. I followed Zac from the beginning and like to see many more youngsters doing things we perhaps also liked when we were young. When I heart of Laura I also followed this story. Because it got so much media attention already in the Netherlands Authorities had to do something. We have laws for school going kids, and as I read the posts here, there are laws and rules in the USA as well. Perhaps even more. But different countries with different rules with same intentions. Even New Zeeland probably won't let her go.
Holland is a very small country and we are not used to home-schooling. I heart of home-schooling on Dutch cruisers around the world, but than with parents on board. My opinion on this is that a girl with so many tasks to do, she has no time for doing home-schooling. Internet at sea? And then the physical part. Is she strong enough? And can she do the many technical parts. She has been held in England. How will other countries (Authorities) react and will she not been abused by rough harbour people, Fishermen at sea etc. with the wrong intentions.

Nature can be harsh and people violent especially for a lonely 13 year old girl without supervision. The world isn't (always) nice.

If it was my girl I say NO. Not for the honour to be the first and youngest. If she likes the sailing and adventure, then why not with her father?

I like to see her go. But she has to follow the rules and mostly I like to see her safe!
 
#37 ·
Sounds very reasonable to me Pierre. I'm with you.

I think it was CD who asked if there was a double standard here in comparing the hesitancy to let her do this with the general support of Zac's trip. And I'll be honest...I do think letting this young girl go is far worse because of all the reasons you mention above. It's not the worst of nature that scares me, it's the worst of men.

Maybe that is a double standard - maybe Zac could have suffered the same potential atrocities - but I honestly don't think so. And especially after so much global attention - I think it's insane to send this girl off now. It's like chumming the water then sending your kind in to swim.

The downsides of press and sponsorship I guess.
 
#38 ·
Gesh... If she went, the parents would have to set up a world wide net of care givers to assume custody until she clears customs and is headed out to the next port.
If the Boy started at fifteen then she could wait a couple of years and then see if the desire to sail the world is still there. And if that desire is still there then she could try then. But the key issue would be the Care givers in various ports that would see to her and the boat's need.
 
#40 ·
John

Having done it in Ny your required to have the SCHOOL approve and monitor your home school program which is WHY i had to use she does not live in Ny anymore F-OFF plan

It was intresting and made the papers at the time as great neck schools had done a program to allow Sarah Hughes to school while doing the Olympics and they got the seat time ISSUE waved


Commack schools were i live would not do anything as despite having compleatly wired class rooms that allowed you be in class from anyplace the teachers contract did not require them to use it OR do e-mail :) and they stayed hung up on the required seat time
 
#41 ·
John

Having done it in Ny your required to have the SCHOOL approve and monitor your home school program which is WHY i had to use she does not live in Ny anymore F-OFF plan

It was intresting and made the papers at the time as great neck schools had done a program to allow Sarah Hughes to school while doing the Olympics and they got the seat time ISSUE waved

Commack schools were i live would not do anything as despite having compleatly wired class rooms that allowed you be in class from anyplace the teachers contract did not require them to use it OR do e-mail :) and they stayed hung up on the required seat time
Tommays,

I understand that some jurisdictions have such rules in place to oversee curriculum. But that is not the same as you having to receive permission to homeschool your kids. You are in fact ALLOWED to homeschool your kids, the only constraint in your particular jurisdiction being that they must approve the curriculum. That is very different from Holland where attending the state school system is apparently compulsory.
 
#42 ·
JohnRPollard said:
I'm going to respectfully disagree.

As far as the curriculum, home schooled kids can have as structured or unstructured a program as their parents want.
I am also going to have to respectfully disagree. Yes, you can choose to home-school your children in all 50 states. There are, however, only 10 states that leave homeschooling essentially unregulated--where "unschooling" would be an option. In all the other 40 states (and in DC) you are required to answer to the authorities in some manner as regards the curriculum you are using, the hours of education your child is receiving, your methods for grading, and so on.

As specifically regards the Dekker girl, I think she is too young. There is a world of difference between the average 15 year old and even the most mature of 13 year olds (and I think 15 is too young, too!). My daughter was extremely mature for her age at 13. Showed much better judgment and independence than any other 13 year old I have known. She still was not mature enough for something like this.

And I have to agree that I just don't see anyway that she can homeschool herself while at the same time single-handing a boat around the world. At least not and be able to do it to any sort of acceptable standard.

Yes, it would be a tremendous experience for her, at least if she lives through it. That alone, however, doesn't even come close to being a justification for letting her go.
 
#43 ·
Again the two school years your talking about are highly overrated ,my daughter had a marginal formal education for two years and was able to step right back in to the 12th grade and excel because it easy compared to the rigors of training full time

Not that i am against school my wife has and MBA the son has one year left in law school and the daughter two for her MSW

I just went to grease monkey school and paid for everything but its a high tech world and there's no life if you DON'T learn just how we THINK you should :rolleyes:
 
#45 ·
I guess I should have been more specific in my original post. Obviously homeschooling counts as a form of education, along with trade schools, or any other non-traditional forms of school. My point was that in most states, if not all, parents are required to provide for the education of their children up to a certain age. Failing to do so will almost guarantee a visit from a social worker. A parent deciding to pull their kid out of school for two years regardless of the reason should probably expect some grief for it. Heck, parents of student athletes or performers (musicians, actors, etc) deal with this all the time and their kids don't miss nearly that much school.
 
#46 ·
I should add surprisingly my daughter had no problems getting a job in the eating disorder research lab at SUNY Buffalo because of what she learned in the dance world and it was also a BIG help getting into SUNY Stonybrook as she had something a bit different to bring to the program
 
#47 ·
Awl come on you naysayers. Where there's a will... Their government is against it, the school's against it and although it's probably divorce sour grapes, Mom's against it.

So where is a loving, concerned dad with custody turn, to live out a dream that he is well past the age limit and probably doesn't have the nads for it anyway? "Oh sweetie, wanna go sailing"?

TOO YOUNG? Nah. A few cycles in a commercial washer will get her into the motion and psychologically prepare her for the rigors of off shore sailing. They say girls mature faster and she'll have two whole years to do that. I mean jeez, where do these countries get these child protection laws?

PREPARATION: Maybe he should pack her up and move to India where they don't bother with this kind of crap. While in training, to help defray the cost of her steroid treatments (to make up for her small stature and to build upper body strength), she could roll bidis cigarettes to also develope finger/hand dexterity. If she rolls for 18 hours a day, she may be able to send mommy a few of daddy's alimony payments as well.

EDGE-MA-CATION? Heck, what for? Just build an onboard shelf for a few McGuffey Readers and turn her loose. After all the steriod treatments she's going to sound much like Barry White and probably make a fortune making R & B CDs for the lovelorn, so why go to the expense? Daddy could use the extra cash for a receational couple of hours in one of India's fine opium pits so he can actually see his own thought processes go up in smoke.

PERSONAL SAFTY: I'm not going back to recall the brand of boat for her intended use, but as I recall, it surely invoked a sense of security and safety. Good nuff. By the time she leaves for her little walk about and with proper small arms weapons trainning, she'll be able to handle an AK-47 better than most adults. Ya just can't beat the quick reflexes of a juiced up 13 yo!
Of course she'll have to surrender all weapons at some of her stops. Although she probably won't be green, that Lou Ferrigno look should deter any unwanted criminal activity.

I'm sure that I may have miss some secondary preparation, but I'll wager the father of this kid won't. After all...it is for a RECORD!
 
#51 · (Edited)
I think it is possible that the dad was just SUPPORTING his daughter's dream. The court said NO but stood by him as a dad. I am sorry but I do/will stand my kids. If they said they could do something great and I could stand behind them and believe in them that is a great thing.

I disagree with the fascination and focus on how the dad is probably nuts...we need to stand by our kids more and that is what I believe could be the theme of this story... although I have no idea what the situation really is, and how could I through a couple of media reports.

Oh and yes, homeschooling can be awesome, I have met MANY well balanced well educated kids who were home-schooled.
 
#52 · (Edited)
Children are not the property of their parents. They do not have absolute rights over them, nor should they. They are entrusted to look after their best interests and to keep them safe above all else. Parental rights are not limitless in any society that I am aware of although I'm sure there are exceptions. We don't let kids smoke or drink alcohol legally despite what parents have to say. Even in the US, are parental rights limited when such questions arise. I would propose that sailing solo around the world is likely more hazardous to the health, or at least potentially so, than either smoking or drinking. When it looks like parents may not be fulfilling their obligations to the child to keep them safe, I think that is perfectly within the rights of the state to intervene. In this case the Dutch court has not said "no", they have said "whoa...lets take a step back and review the situation". They are acting more as advocates for a child that may not have the maturity or judgement to advocate for herself..or maybe she does, that is what the court is trying to determine. It would be difficult to advocate once this girl is already alone on the high seas.
Somebody else brought up another good point, the seas are only one danger, what about the ports that this girl will visit? How safe are they?
It seems to me as well that there are definite cultural views that color how one views this situation. Americans as a whole seem to be a lot more sensitive to governments infringing on what they perceive as rights and freedoms. That is not intended as a criticism , just an observation. Those of us that live in "socialist" countries like Canada ;) seem much more willing to accept limits to certain freedoms if it is for the perceived "greater good". Gun control is one example of that (not to open another debate).
Just my $0.02...its worth what you paid for it :)
Respect to all....
 
#53 · (Edited)
I have to agree with RandyBC. You don't make rules that are geared to only the exceptional people. Jut because one 13 year old girl may be able to do it shouldn't mean all should be allowed. I know know one has suggested all should be lowed but rules have to do their best to support the majority not the minority.

I know the slippery slope argument is a bad one but what if the girl really wanted to go into prostitution and here dad supported it. If the government intervened would we be crying for her freedom or here parents rights to do with their kids as they pleas. I don't think so.

Rules are intended to serve the collective greater good. They fail all the time but the alternative is much worse. We just have strike a fare balance. That tends to change country to country and person to person.

"Democracy is the worst form of government except for all those others that have been tried."

Winston Churchill
 
#55 ·
Sorry, but I just don't get it. What price do you put on fleeting fame? Any 13 year old is still a child. Given good weather I believe just about any 13 year old with the proper sailing training could make a go at this. But this isn't about good weather. This is about a 13 year old child handling worst case scenarios at sea and in port. As for sexism, I believe it is as irresponsible for a parent to let any child, boy or girl, take that kind of life-threatening risk.

For those that suggest that children be able to make such decisions, do you anticipate 13 year old fire fighters? They probably have the ability to drive a truck, and they really, really want to be a fire-person! A single-hander at sea has all of the risks a firefighter has, only without the support of their fellow firefighters.

Heck, let's put children back in factorys. They could earn records for being the youngest kids in heavy manufacturing. So we lose some children from time to time, that's just the cost of setting records isn't is?

Like I said, it just doesn't make sense to me....
 
#56 ·
Too many people here seem to have a wanton careless attitude about child care predicated upon the old argument about government intervention and some perception a parent knows how to bring up their kids. BS!

There are the same helpless irresponsible parents who depend on laws to prevent their kids from driving a car, buying alcohol or cigarettes, etc.
because the parents are incapable of doing their job.
There are far too many parents who shouldn't be!

Until these people can effectively nurture their children, someone else will have to do it. Any rightfully so.
 
#62 ·
Too many people here seem to have a wanton careless attitude about child care predicated upon the old argument about government intervention and some perception a parent knows how to bring up their kids. BS!
There's nothing outdated about the notion that government is a miserable substitute for a loving parent. Parents are in a position to know how their child feels and thinks about things, and their maturity, or lack thereof, and they are in a position to know the extent of the child's sailing knowledge and skill. A judge knows absolutely nothing about the child, but relies on the testimony of a social worker or psychologist with minimal credentials who has talked with the child for a grand total of an hour or less. The judge probably has no experience sailing, so must rely on the testimony of a sailor to inform him of the challenges involved in a circumnavigation. Because there are no accepted standards of expertise for sailors, the sailor might or might not be sufficiently experienced to express meaningful opinions. Worse yet, the judge might be one of the many ill-informed people who harbors an unexpressed bias against anyone who goes to sea in a small boat, thinking that they must be either crazy or suicidal. Important decisions that will affect your child's life for many years rely upon such a shallow basis. This judge, upon whom you are so ready to rely for a thoughtful decision, might well be the same person who couldn't figure out what to do with an abused child, and so he returned the child to the custody of his abuser, with a stern admonition to not do that anymore.

I spent a career working with judges, and they are generally nice, well-intentioned folks, but a judge doesn't love your child, or know your child, or understand your child, and often doesn't have a very solid grasp of your familial relationship. A judge is the absolute last place you should go for an important decision affecting the life of your child, and then only after all other alternatives have failed. In that case, you might or might not get a sound decision, but at least you'll get a decision.
 
#58 · (Edited)
My 13 yr old daughter saw this story and asked some good questions:
Can her parents visit her in ports along the way?
Will she have a radio to call for help with?
Can she quit if she wants to?
If something breaks and she doesn't know how to fix it, can she radio for help fixing it?
How long is the longest passage between ports?
What's the longest passage she has done already?
and a few others.

Her bottom line was "I wouldn't want to, but if she knows what she's getting into and wants to go, they should let her." She also pointed out that many kids' lifestyles contain more real dangers than Laura will likely face. Personally I think some 13 yr olds have a lot more sense than a lot of adults I know.
 
#60 ·
Her bottom line was "I wouldn't want to, but if she knows what she's getting into and wants to go, they should let her." Personally I think some 13 yr olds have a lot more sense than a lot of adults I know.
The bigger bottom line is she, being 13, can't conceivably "know what she is getting into" and at least one of her parents apparently realizes that.

No matter how much "sense" a child may have, he/she is still a child. When many otherwise intelligent and ostensibly experienced adults can't do this, thinking ANY child can is simply delusional.
 
#59 ·
"Until these people can effectively nurture their children, someone else will have to do it. "

Very kind to the children, but a bit cruel to the gene pool, isn't that?

You're sure it is a good idea to put an end to Darwinian evolution and replace it with "survival of all" ? And everything that comes with "all" running things?
 
#63 · (Edited)
"
You're sure it is a good idea to put an end to Darwinian evolution and replace it with "survival of all" ? And everything that comes with "all" running things?
You say something very interesting. In a lot of hard core conservative views I see undertones of this statement and always wonder if this is what they are really getting at.

Do we build a society where the strong support the weak or where the strong crush the weak.

Being a Canadian we lean toward the former at this time.
 
#64 ·
davidpm said:
She was definitely capable of home-schooling herself from the age of about 10 up.
I don't doubt that. I don't doubt that there are a lot of kids out there who are capable of home-schooling themselves. But can they do it at the same time that they are dealing with all of the issues associated with a solo circumnavigation? THAT, I doubt!
 
#66 ·
JimHawkins said:
My 13 yr old daughter saw this story and asked some good questions:
Can her parents visit her in ports along the way?
Will she have a radio to call for help with?
Can she quit if she wants to?
If something breaks and she doesn't know how to fix it, can she radio for help fixing it?
How long is the longest passage between ports?
What's the longest passage she has done already?
and a few others.
I hope you told your daughter the appropriate answers. For instance, can she radio for help? She can try, but if she's in the middle of the ocean there is very little chance that help will get there in time to make any difference. She needs to be prepared to deal with EVERYTHING that might come up, and to deal with it entirely by herself.

And even then, she's too young.
 
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