Interesting "Discussion" With The Admiral....When were you ready for a 50 mile trip? - Page 2 - SailNet Community

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  #11  
Old 12-08-2011
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NewportNewbie View Post
I am a bit of an adventure lover. I like going places and coming back. I LOVE a great road trip. The feeling of driving somewhere, stopping at cool places on the way and enjoying the scenery unique to that area. Having a boat means that I am seeing things that I never dreamed of. From Newport Beach Catalina Island is 26 miles away. From day 1, I have had the itch to take the boat across the strait to see Catalina Island. I bought the boat in August. I have had some private sailing lessons and I am now comfortable singlehanded sailing even in the ocean. I asked her last week when she wanted to go to Catalina...She said to go with the previous owner who happen to be friends of ours. I agreed, but he wants to do it in 3 days...I want to do it in 1. She now thinks that unless I go with him first to "learn" how to sail to Catalina, I will be killing myself and she won't go because she doesn't want to die in the Ocean. I thought that was extreme. I am not considering a solo trip, but in my mind if I HAD to go solo, I think I could handle the 26 mile journey in good weather. So how long after you began to sail did you do something like this?
You have now owned the boat for 3-1/2 months and have developed some comfort in the relatively benign conditions on the coast. You still have a lot to learn. Never-the-less, a trip to Catalina is not out of reach provided you pick your weather. Sailing there and back in a single day is kind of silly and I can assure you that once you do make the Island, you will not want to turn around and sail back. You will be tired and cold-regardless of the time of year-and will want to take a break.

An alternative that you might consider is you and your pal sailing the boat over to the island--preferably Cat Harbor at this time of year--and letting your wife drive up to Long Beach and take the fast ferry across to join you. On the return, you can sail back to Long Beach, which is only 19 miles from Bird Rock and a fast, easy, trip in most cases-drop her off, and then coast down to Newport yourself or with your pal.

When we had our boat at Alamitos Bay YC, we frequently went over to the Island (leaving from Angles Gate) on Thursday evenings (to ensure we'd get a mooring), took the early fast ferry back to Long Beach in the morning for work, returned to the boat on the ferry Friday evening and then sailed home Sunday afternoon.

In terms of planning, check out SailFlow.com for wind/current predictions. Beware the Santa Ana's.

FWIW...
Faster likes this.
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  #12  
Old 12-08-2011
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Everyone has different levels of comfort, I'm sure. My very first sail was a solo sail about
20 nm from PO's dock to mine. I did make sure I had a "buddy boat" that was alongside
for the initial part of the trip, and was aware and in contact for the entire route. However,
I kept the coastline in sight so I never felt worried.
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  #13  
Old 12-08-2011
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Obvious stuff, but reminders are always helpful... (This assumes you've already mastered how to sail your boat.)

Find a place that she'll like that's a short sail away. Take her there and back a few times. Maybe a great place to have lunch. Make the whole trip wonderful -- good food, no dishes to wash, the music she likes, a smell she likes, a shoreside activity she likes (shopping, bowling, horseback riding, shell collecting, whatever it is), good metrics on your progress there and back, a fun onboard task for her (steering, buoy spotting, sail trim, whatever she likes). You are playing host to a new guest aboard, one that you highly value.

Second, avoid the downside - no bad weather, no big waves, no excessive heat, no rain, no breakdowns, no boat clutter, no head smells (air out the boat before she gets there), no dirty anything... you get the idea. You sail with many safety Plan Bs in your mind. Have a plan B if a dating downside surfaces - ferry ride home, rental car, hotel stay, friend to call, etc.

Third, add a fun custom, like taking a picture of you both at each destination, kisses after every tack, foot massage (for her) after every gybe, finding a rock to write on, sending yourself a postcard, putting a mesage in a bottle, toasting the sunset, silly laugh contest, whatever. At a minimum, kisses at sunset.

Enjoy the smile on your face.

Repeat until she brings up the idea of going to Catalina Island.

(If she doesn't bring up Catalina Island after 10 trips, show her a picture of something interesting on Catalina Island and talk about what makes it interesting. Repeat after every 10 trips.)

Regards,
Brad
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Last edited by Bene505; 12-08-2011 at 10:41 AM.
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  #14  
Old 12-08-2011
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thx all for the great ideas....she will NEVER have the same passion for this as I do...she won't admit it but the Ocean freaks her out. She is ok with me sailing alone or with friends...
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  #15  
Old 12-08-2011
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She is ok with me sailing alone or with friends...
Make the trip with one of your friends the first time. When you get back, tell her what a piece of cake it was. Show her what she missed.

@Brad, TMI!
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  #16  
Old 12-08-2011
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I had the same idea to take my wife and daughter there on Xmas break. She seemed hesitant, but willing to trust me. I whittled it down to sailing to Isthmus from MDR (33 NM), then taking a bus to Avalon and spending a day or two there. Then the girls would take the ferry back to MDR and my son and me would sail back.
when I told my plan to my mentor and dock neighbor, Jim (he's an old salt with plenty of sage advice), he said simply "if you want your wife to sail again, don't take her to Catalina". With that, the trip became a 2 hour jaunt to King Harbor in Redondo. Now, I'm thinking a short trip out into Santa Monica Harbor to maybe see some whales and go back when the girls are ready.
This is all weather contingent, of course, but work schedules are what they are and we must make due.
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Old 12-08-2011
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1st mistake is sticking to a schedule. the weather makes the schedule. should a sudden storm come up, you'll need to sit it out.

Probably you can plan for 3 days in CA, but some areas, like Florida 3 days is a long time.

Bene has good advise. do it by yourself or with friends. one long day for a newbie, is pressing your luck. -if you had 20 years experience under your belt I'd feel different.

small steps, 1st.

and how about she meet you over there?
don't they have a fast ferry? bet she likes it once she gets there... sets up the next trip.

GL!

ps: does she get sea sick? worst case is being sea sick for 6 hours... that alone will kill all future trips.

Last edited by ftldiver; 12-08-2011 at 01:22 PM.
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Old 12-08-2011
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sailortjk1 View Post
Make the trip with one of your friends the first time. When you get back, tell her what a piece of cake it was. Show her what she missed.

@Brad, TMI!
I made those up as good examples. Feel free to apply them.

In reality, our first week-long vacation on the boat was to a small island at the inlet to Nappeague Harbor, where we explored and renamed the island. (It's since turned into a bird sanctuary). Then Sag Harbor, where we had ice cream and walked around a short bit. Then we cruised around Shelter Island, walking to a restaurant from Cockles Harbor. Leaving Cockles, there was a thunderstorm in the distance headed our way, so I did a 180 and we stayed another day. At anchor, right off the shore, we watched the thunder and rain all around us from under the bimini. It was breathtaking. And my 3 year old got over her fear of thunder. (Not sure I was as relaxed.) The next day, with excellent weather, we sailed around the north side of Gardiner's Island and back to where we started. During the whole trip, on our 50' boat, we never saw waves over 1 foot high. My wife and all the kids (ages 3 to 11 at the time) had a great time. I was estatic.

The next trip a few weeks later was to Block Island, RI where we chased down a bunch of helium balloons and saw a large sunfish enroute. We walked to the beach, swam in the ocean and had more ice cream. Then to Mystic CT, where we joined the museum and tied up at one of the (absent) historic ship's spots. (The one right near the lighthouse.) We got to use the members room, stay after hours and see the "pirate ships" as my kids called them. Biggest waves were 2.5 feet high, off Block Island. Most of the time (e.g. the NW side of Fishers Island) the waves were smaller. We had a great time.

Hope that helps. It was fun bringing back these memories.

Regards,
Brad
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Last edited by Bene505; 12-08-2011 at 02:28 PM.
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  #19  
Old 12-08-2011
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Interesting Bene. We are members of Mystic and stay there two nights whenebver we stop there on our NE/ LI trip in the summer as the second night is free. The msueum is a great place to be at night once they close the gates isnt it.

Making this positive for her is the key here. You can always do this with a friend without her, but after a while you will not be bale to continue with two seperate lives or activities. It is better when you and your pafrtner can share in this although the passions may not be equal. In the big picture long run, you will want her to at least like this activity, which may mean compromising some of your far reaching super adventourous goals for a while to allay her fears.

I have not seen too many happy couples happy couple where one person likes and loves his/ her boat, where the other is rarely involved and always is doing other activities. Usually this eventually results in either the boat or the partner disappearing for good. The compromise to involved the other partner slowly patiently will pay in the long run with both of you enjoying the boat at some level. Understand it may not be necessarily at the degree you have projected. You should try to solve this with influence rather than force your ways or do it seperately.

Dave
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  #20  
Old 12-08-2011
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I took lessons, spent 3 months of weekend day sailing, bought a boat and the first trip on that was 3 days though unknown waters to bring it home (on a schedule to make it worst)

which included a gale on the third day, a broken furling line in bad bad conditions that unrolled the head sail at a bad time, running out of fuel, an autopilot that broke

what doesn't kill you ................ well just doesn't kill you
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