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Best Ad Ever. Today.

5K views 40 replies 21 participants last post by  krisscross 
#1 ·
Oh, snap.

Buy my stupid ex-boyfriend's boat: It's cheap, like his excuses! - Ottawa Sailboats For Sale - Kijiji Ottawa Canada.

In case the ad disappears:

"My stupid ex boyfriend is a commitment-phobe, so I guess it's no surprise that he wasn't up to the commitment involved in owning a boat. Like every other good thing in his life, my stupid ex boyfriend walked away from a beautiful sailboat, and left me to pick up the pieces. So I`m selling it. Don`t worry; I`m not a crazy jilted woman. I`ve got the legal right to sell this beauty.
The boat is actually quite wonderful, unlike my stupid ex boyfriend. It's a classic Alberg 22, with a full keel, a furling jib (something the stupid ex boyfriend never fully understood) and a suite of sails, all in pretty good condition. It's also unique in that it's got a black mast, and from the research I've done, it might be one of a kind in that sense. One of a kind--definitely not like my stupid ex boyfriend. It also has some very valuable opening, screened ports, probably worth more than I'm asking for the boat just themselves. I just want this thing out of my hands!
With a little dedication and work, this boat could be turned into something really special, not like my stupid ex boyfriend. No amount of work, dedication or patience could save him. Not even Christ can save him. Luckily for you, he never followed through on his plans for the boat (typical). Otherwise, who knows what kind of disaster he would have left in his wake (also typical). So do me, and yourself a favour, and buy my stupid ex boyfriend's ex-sailboat. Deals like this don't come around every day! The boat must be owned by a member at Nepean Sailing Club, or removed, by Wednesday. If not, I'm having it trucked away, and the price will go up. Hurry!!

What you get:
Alberg 22 sailboat, sound hull and deck with amazing woodwork both interior and exterior
Folding cradle
Custom-made skeleton and canvas boat cover for winter
All sails, both hank-on or furling configurations
The satisfaction of knowing that my stupid ex boyfriend has nothing, and you have a beautiful boat"
 
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#9 ·
Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned,
Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned


- The Mourning Bride, Act III, Scene VIII, by William Congreve
 
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#11 ·
if he couldnt understand the roller furling, hewasnt worthy of keeping the boat...lol


attitude depends on the side you are in allegiance with.....men stick with men, and women usually stick with women--i dont stick with anyone, but this is awesome, and he deserved every mouthful of words.....they may just sell the boat....

as she races, she could be dead on accurate of his failings about which she wrote in public...geaux girl....
 
#21 ·
I'm willing to bet no one has ever committed to the nut job. :)
Judgmental much?

You see a nutjob.
I see humour, fun, and a sense for marketing a beat boat in a bad market.

Let's take the romance out of this for a second. Let's say you and a buddy get a great deal on a boat that you plan to clean up and flip. You then proceed to start a refit and your buddy gets tired of it, or gets tired of working with you because you have different objectives, or expectations or whatever, and left you with a beat boat you don't need, want or can afford. How would you sound?
 
#22 ·
I'm with you Brian. I liked that woman right off the bat.
Why is everybody reading her so negatively? Maybe the boyfriend was a worthless lout who abandoned a project boat and the girl.
No matter, I dig her sense of humor and her attempt to turn a bad relationship into a marketing ploy (if, indeed, there was a bad relationship at all-- it may have all been a Madison Avenue scheme).
 
#26 ·
Good luck with that. I'm not trying to figure you out or the nut job, nor intend to explain myself to you. Yes, I think publishing a story about your 'stupid ex-boyfriend' is funny and immature and nutty, no matter the reason. You may have one take on it, I may have another.

Nothing I posted was directed at you, until you thought to accuse me of being judgmental. Ain't taking the bait and starting this with you again.
 
#30 ·
Actually, if you knew the back story you would see that it is legit, and the girls has brains.
She had to do something quick about the boat since the boyfriend washed his hands of it, leaving her the remainder of the purchase price, and the winter storage bill. The marina was threatening to padlock the boat, so she took control. She arranged to have it removed this week, appeasing the marina, and put up an add that got immediate and extraordinary results. The boat will probably be sold before the removal deadline.
She is a communications consultant, and if it was my boat, she definitely would have earned her fee.
 
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