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  #21  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

You don't meet more people having kids. You meet different people. I'm am a coffee shop waking up and doing laundry at the marina. If you were sitting across from me, a couple, or a couple with kids. I might meet the couple, but I wouldn't meet the couple with the kids. I can't remember the last mom I randomly talked to but I probably met 4 random people yesterday. Maybe they had kids but they weren't with them.

People with kids get so wrapped up in their lives of doing kid stuff they just forget what life used to be like or COULD have been like. I have memories too of boys scout trips to land between the lakes and up the Mississippi River. Vacations with my family to california or Florida. Twice to Europe. But that wasn't because my parents were cool. That's because my parent(stay at home mom) worked as an accountant!, yes then got his MBA through night school and eventually worked 80 hours a week and commuted so that once or twice a year we could take vacations.

That's what they were too. Not travels but vacations. That's ok.

Look. I'm not trying to say kids suck and nobody should have them. If you like kids and you want to prioritize them that's fine. But unless you're really rich you're going to make sacrifices.

This topic is about the Florida guy and I don't think he would have the option to go volunteer in Africa or even have spent the money to buy the boat if at 23 he chose to have a kid. He would be doing kid stuff.

You don't know the kind of adventure that awaits if you make your life free. I've been out sailing and I've already turned down a trip on a boat to Hawaii and another crew around the northwest. I was in Friday harbor and started talking to two people. The older one asked me if I was a sailor. I said I was. He said would you be interested in crewing for me. I've just bought a forty something footer and was going up far into Canada later in the summer. There are people with big boats that need crew and they are going to exotic places.

I'm not criticizing anyone's choices but don't be fooled into thinking that you can have kids and take off for a year around the world. That door is closed for a long time. Maybe forever.

Last edited by northoceanbeach; 05-22-2013 at 02:08 PM.
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  #22  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

Quote:
Originally Posted by northoceanbeach View Post
You don't meet more people having kids. You meet different people. I'm am a coffee shop waking up and doing laundry at the marina. If you were sitting across from me, a couple, or a couple with kids. I might meet the couple, but I wouldn't meet the couple with the kids. I can't remember the last mom I randomly talked to but I probably met 4 random people yesterday. Maybe they had kids but they weren't with them.

People with kids get so wrapped up in their lives of doing kid stuff they just forget what life used to be like or COULD have been like. I have memories too of boys scout trips to land between the lakes and up the Mississippi River. Vacations with my family to california or Florida. Twice to Europe. But that wasn't because my parents were cool. That's because my parent(stay at home mom) worked as an accountant!, yes then got his MBA through night school and eventually worked 80 hours a week and commuted so that once or twice a year we could take vacations.

That's what they were too. Not travels but vacations. That's ok.

Look. I'm not trying to say kids suck and nobody should have them. If you like kids and you want to prioritize them that's fine. But unless you're really rich you're going to make sacrifices.

This topic is about the Florida guy and I don't think he would have the option to go volunteer in Africa or even have spent the money to buy the boat if at 23 he chose to have a kid. He would be doing kid stuff.

You don't know the kind of adventure that awaits if you make your life free. I've been out sailing and I've already turned down a trip on a boat to Hawaii and another crew around the northwest. I was in Friday harbor and started talking to two people. The older one asked me if I was a sailor. I said I was. He said would you be interested in crewing for me. I've just bought a forty something footer and was going up far into Canada later in the summer. There are people with big boats that need crew and they are going to exotic places.

I'm not criticizing anyone's choices but don't be fooled into thinking that you can have kids and take off for a year around the world. That door is closed for a long time. Maybe forever.
Well...except that there ARE people doing it, and they don't appear to be rich.

http://www.windtraveler.net/
http://anasaziracing.blogspot.com/

So...sure...it'd be different, and some different choices might be made, and it would be a different experience, but to say that the "door is closed" or "it can't be done" is a complete non-sequitur. Honestly, I can't believe that I'm saying this as I have been until very very recently in the "screw having kids, they'll ruin my life!" club, but sometimes things change as you get a bit older. Sometimes they don't, to each their own! (and no, I don't have kids currently, nor are any planned in the near future...just saying that I have come to the mindset of that they wouldn't ruin my life or keep me from doing [mostly] anything I might want.)
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  #23  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

Popcorn is almost ready
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  #24  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

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Popcorn is almost ready
hehe...naw...not trying to have an argument. I've just generally been taught to never say "can't" or "never."
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  #25  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

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Originally Posted by northoceanbeach View Post
I'm not criticizing anyone's choices but don't be fooled into thinking that you can have kids and take off for a year around the world. That door is closed for a long time. Maybe forever.
I disagree. It may make it harder, but it's certainly not impossible. There are lots of young families out there cruising with small kids. Many here on SN. Look around.

Choosing to have a child is the most significant decision anyone can make (at least it should be). I chose not to have children, but I have the greatest admiration for good parents. It's not the easiest path, but for some (many) it is absolutely vital. I find my parent friends tend to be a lot more driven than me, and get a lot more done in a shorter amount of time. Perhaps that's more a statement about me , but I tend to think it's out of necessity.

Having children changes your life -- it bloody well should! But that doesn't make it a lesser life, nor a grander life. It's just different.
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  #26  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure









There is just nothing worse in life than spending time with your children doing things
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  #27  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

Quote:
Originally Posted by northoceanbeach View Post
I'm not criticizing anyone's choices but don't be fooled into thinking that you can have kids and take off for a year around the world. That door is closed for a long time. Maybe forever.
Some people do... I can't, but that's because of more than just having a kid. There are other adventures to be had. I can say without a doubt that I sail MORE because of my son. I wouldn't have bought my boat if it weren't for him and I wouldn't still be living on the lake if it weren't for my wanting to give him the great childhood that I had.

Not arguing, you make valid points. There are just two sides to everything.
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  #28  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

I disagree that jobs kill the possibility of adventure. In some ways having a reliable income helps a lot. It does reduce available time, but doesn't eliminate it. I have many friends who are hiking, bicycle touring, sailing, skiing, or climbing mountains at least half of the weekends of the year. The same folks go on vacations with these same types of activities. They are spending a good chunk of the year outside, but are also earning and saving for a comfortable home life and retirement.

Not all parents are totally kid focused. I think you are missing out on meeting some great people if you avoid the ones with kids (or the kids themselves). Where are the next generation of adventurers going to come from?
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  #29  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

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Originally Posted by Alex W View Post
I disagree that jobs kill the possibility of adventure. In some ways having a reliable income helps a lot. It does reduce available time, but doesn't eliminate it. I have many friends who are hiking, bicycle touring, sailing, skiing, or climbing mountains at least half of the weekends of the year. The same folks go on vacations with these same types of activities. They are spending a good chunk of the year outside, but are also earning and saving for a comfortable home life and retirement.

Not all parents are totally kid focused. I think you are missing out on meeting some great people if you avoid the ones with kids (or the kids themselves). Where are the next generation of adventurers going to come from?
I think right now I feel about the same about jobs as northoceanbeach does about kids. I've got a job, and sure, the steady income is nice. Its definitely all about living for the weekend and the scarce vacations though. I acknowledge my bias in that I don't particularly LIKE my job and am certainly not fulfilled by it. My opinion could/would certainly change if that weren't true. I even get 4 weeks of vacation a year, which is twice what many people get...it isn't nearly enough! What would really be the ideal situation would be living on a boat, and taking short term contract engineering positions for 3-6 months every 6-12 months someplace where we can still live on the boat. So 3-6 months working...6-18 months off to do adventuring/cruising/travel. We'll see if I can get that to work...
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  #30  
Old 05-22-2013
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Re: Young people and adventure

Its not an argument its a discussion right? Im always willing to be convinced Im wrong also.

There are worse things in life than going out sailing with your kids. It's all the extra work you have to do to make that possible. To pay for them. That money could find your adventures.

Those kids look old anyways. What do you miss to get them to that point? This is about young people and adventure and what it takes I get it. In sure tere are people with careers and kids that go out sailing. But not the Floida guy. He's 23. Any kid he would have would be like 2. The risks he's taking shouldn't be taking with a two year old on board. So the door to his summer would have been closed. Maybe it would open again once his kid is 14. But then he missed 14 years.

It's a monumental decision an the worst one you can make to make you sailing dreams a reality.

Can you sail with kids? Yes. Can I sail with 20 dogs? Probably. And I could find some moment in that chaos to smile and take a nice picture to show everyone how awesome it is to sail with twenty dogs and how it could be done. It's alot harder and sucks more though.

Post some pictures of Timmy getting the plague from school and you staying up all night with him and missing your race the next day. Take a picture of yourself at soccer practice and writing the check for the shoes and pads and fees that could have been a week cruising your local area.

Take a picture of the kids' college fund instead of your boat fund.
People with kids always tell you how great it is and show pictures of te happy times but from what little I've been around children it's not that utopian. I found it pretty terrible.

How does a coie even go sailing without the kids? Even if you ind time and money for every thing else. Assume the kids aren't sick this week and don't have any events scheduled. How do ou go without them? You can't. You can't take them all the time. Sometimes it's not safe. Like when an inexperienced guy goes out the inlet in Florida. Or when I k trough a pass the first time. You can't have kids on boat they could get killed.
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