I read this with interest. I like a lot of what Nick says.
I think SD has a valid couple of points. First, **** really does happen. To the best of us. Never say never, because there but for the grace of [insert your higher power of choice here] go you and all that.
I also find myself agreeing about his perception of yelling having a place. That place is limited and an exception rather than the rule: in an emergency, in a moment of great urgency as an attention getter. There is a difference between yelling a warning or an urgent instruction, and yelling out of impatience or anger or frustration.
Huge difference. Huge huge huge.
I think most Wives can understand a "Look out!" type yell vs. a Poor Teacher/Frustrated Husband type yell.
My husband has a lot more experience than I do, but if he makes our trips together unpleasant by yelling or talking down to me, that daysail is gonna turn pretty damn hostile.
(and then I kick him off MY boat. My name is on the registration, bwah hah hah
But if he yells because something needs my attention now, well, I get that. I might have occasion to yell too. When yelling is the exception, rather than a rule, it works far better as the attention getter it's supposed to be.
As it so happens, he's not a yeller, so if he raises his voice, I know something is amiss more than me not trimming the jib to his satisfaction.
One other observation that might have already been observed: I'd hope that anyone, man or woman, endeavoring to teach someone else would know that you don't have to literally yell to put someone off of you and the subject you're trying to teach. If you're not having a good time teaching, they won't have a good time learning
. Be mindful of tone, expression, body language, yours and theirs.