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  #11  
Old 09-02-2003
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kokopelli9 is an unknown quantity at this point
just can''''t help it.

There will probably come a time in your life when your daughter will want to do something that you wish you could talk her out of...hopefully you''ll remember these posts and wish her wisdom, luck, and much happiness. And above all you''ll let her make her own mistakes and/or successes.
There will be no words that will ease your mind at the time. Nor will there be anything to change your worry other than time. Time which is the greatest of healers and teachers is what will be needed now also. Your parents raised you to be strong, responsible and caring...it is time now for them to trust the job they did.
Do all that you can do to prepare for the safety for all THREE of you. Have a wonderful journey. Learn about each other and life. And then cherish the memories that you will have.
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  #12  
Old 09-04-2003
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fourknots is on a distinguished road
just can''''t help it.

I agree with the last posters. It''s your life. Use it. Your child is not old enough to be involved in the decision making - you and your wife do it for her as the people with the most knowledge of the situation.

My mother thought it was a bad idea taking her grandkids on an "unsafe" sailboat journey. I said I respected her views, but that my wife agreed with me and we were going anyway. Now, she brags about the "adventure" her grandkids had and how it made them special.

If you only do what makes others happy, you''ll never be happy. The 3 years I spent with my kids 24/7 are something that I will cherish until I die. Don''t let someone talk you out of a dream. You seem level-headed enough, have an adventure! Don''t kick yourself when you''re 70 and wish you''d done something that everyone talked you out of.

Luck, wisdom, and happiness.
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  #13  
Old 09-04-2003
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mdougan is on a distinguished road
just can''''t help it.

Yea, I think Ricky Nelson had it right, "you can''t please everyone..."

Basically, as long as your wife''s on board, what more do you need?

But if you''re the sensitive type, you might invite the objecting grand parents out for a weekend on the lake. I find that people fear the unknown, and perhaps letting them see you and your family together in such a stout boat will change their perspective.

On a practical note, pick your seasons carefully. That''s a lot of water to cover in varying climates.

Also, you may hate yourself if you end up putting your westsail in a marina on the ICW. I bought mine down in Daytona and kept running aground in or around the Ponce Inlet. I could only get in or out to the ocean at high tide, and even then, I had to be awefully careful where I steered... get towing insurance
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  #14  
Old 09-04-2003
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mdougan is on a distinguished road
just can''''t help it.

PS. By "as long as your wife''s on board what more do you need", I meant as long as your wife is in agreement with what you''re doing, of course I''m including your your 12 month old as being physically on board
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  #15  
Old 09-08-2003
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DuaneIsing is on a distinguished road
just can''''t help it.

Okay, Nereus32. You got a lot of answers to your post in the last week. Are you still there?
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  #16  
Old 09-08-2003
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Nereus32 is an unknown quantity at this point
just can''''t help it.

Yes, I am still here. I''m sorry for my delinquency, as I have been quite busy. While still working my full-time job, parenting, and refitting the boat, my wife and I have returned to college to reeducate ourselves, so when we reach our final destination, we''ll have a head start on the local job market.

I want to thank all of you for the positive encouragement. Put your minds at ease and know that we will sail when we are ready and on our own terms. One thing my parents do know is when I set my mind to do something it is as good as written in stone.

That said, my question here is geared more toward maintaining a certain level of respect and tranquility amongst the family ranks. Returning home from a long journey only to find the welcome mat isn''t at the door for us would be unpleasant. Not that that would really happen, but why pour salt in an open wound? As all of you have pointed out, we are reasonable people and our parents have done their parts in providing us with the tools to make reasonable decisions. It is nice to know, through their concerns, that they care. Hence my desire to ease their burden.

In the end, this adventure may allow us to all grow as an extended family. They can vicariously adventure with us and share in our experiences. It may just be family history in the making. It certainly would be more than our current daily drone in the workplace, which makes telephone conversatons incredibly brief and boring (So...what''s the weather like?). It will definitely make interesting conversation at the next family reunion.

Thanks again for all your positive thoughts. Even thought I don''t personally know any of you, it is heart-warming to know there are friends out there who will offer advice, opinions, and encouragement when needed.
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  #17  
Old 09-09-2003
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DuaneIsing is on a distinguished road
just can''''t help it.

Nereus32,

Glad you checked in; you sure do sound busy!

Barring someone who could have told you, "we were in the same situation and here''s how we handled it," I think you already have all the "ammunition" you need to defend your decision with the relatives. Just the wording in your last post should be enough.

Of course, we don''t know these particular people, so we cannot offer specific advice on what will make your parents come around to your thinking. It''s my opinion that you should continue to be sensitive and understanding to their position, but realize that there''s only so much you can do. Don''t get dragged down by other''s negativity.

Again, best of luck.

Duane
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  #18  
Old 09-09-2003
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mdougan is on a distinguished road
just can''''t help it.

Just to underscore a point I''d made before, the best way to get people excited about something like this is to make them a part of it.

I do computer software developement and when we get users who are irrationally opposed to our new system, we get them involved in the design of it... maybe even just suggesting what icons to use... suddenly, the biggest project detractor is the biggest project supporter.

It would even be ideal if you could get them to accompany you on short segments of your trip, then, your scary whimsical trip becomes, as you said, an interesting chapter in the family history. As a fellow Westsailor, I know you don''t have a lot of extra room, but some short trip segment might be possible
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  #19  
Old 09-09-2003
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kokopelli9 is an unknown quantity at this point
just can''''t help it.

Glad we could be of help. And as for the respect and tranquility....that will be there...sounds like all of you have love for each other so the rest will find a way to fall into place.
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  #20  
Old 09-09-2003
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conradconrad is on a distinguished road
just can''''t help it.

As you once said geeeeeeeezzzzzz Kokopelli9 do you thik our parents would mind toooooooooo much if we went sailing together one of these days?????????///
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