How many women here own their own boat? - Page 17 - SailNet Community
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post #161 of 231 Old 06-29-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

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...

As for women handling their own boats, we are around. ....
Our slip is in a very tight basin that is difficult to maneuver in under any circumstances and particularly so when the wind is out of the south with any speed. I can't even count the number of boats that have ended up drifting broadside to and hanging up on the pilings on the north end of the basin and extricating them, without damage to the transoms of other yachts moored there, is a major pain in the neck. Never-the-less, when we are coming into our slip, my wife "drives" while I handle the lines as it makes no sense to me to have a 4'11" 100# woman attempting to handle lines on a 23,000± lb yacht, particularly when there's any unfavorable wind. She is the only woman in our club that handles her own boat and is often applauded for her skill by bystanders, some of whom feel compelled to shout out instructions often contrary to what's needed or appropriate. Fortunately, she's learned to ignore the chatter and manage the boat herself. And why not? How could gender have anything to do with boat handling skill at all?

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post #162 of 231 Old 06-29-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

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How could gender have anything to do with boat handling skill at all?
Egzactly! It begs the question why aren't there more women at the tillers?
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post #163 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

Husband and I may both own the boat (this one, my others were all mine) but I am skipper: I helm, dock and make most of the decisions in regards the boat. As we say, he writes the checks.

It's always funny to watch the marina as I maneuver my cat, those heads peeping out from under biminis and dodgers. Of course the cat makes me look good with those nice two engines to steer with. My trimaran was a bitch to maneuver in close quarters. Speaking of not understanding pivot points, I was getting the cat off a dock in a stiff crosswind. A fella came along to help and kept hollering at me to 'turn the wheel!" Had I done so, I would have pivoted my sterns right into the dock, as the rudder is a couple feet forward of the transom...

Certainly as was mentioned above it makes far more sense for the stronger one to handle lines as one is docking. Also it is my observation that women tend to make better helms, I guess we notice nuances.

I really think 'cute' things like calling women 'admiral' and other such patronizing remarks etc demonstrate the chauvinism I experience with frequency in the sailing world. Maybe the pursuit of sailing just attracts chauvinists, and with that, women are relegated to galley slavery. Who knows?
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post #164 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

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Originally Posted by Multihullgirl View Post
Husband and I may both own the boat (this one, my others were all mine) but I am skipper: I helm, dock and make most of the decisions in regards the boat. As we say, he writes the checks.

It's always funny to watch the marina as I maneuver my cat, those heads peeping out from under biminis and dodgers. Of course the cat makes me look good with those nice two engines to steer with. My trimaran was a bitch to maneuver in close quarters. Speaking of not understanding pivot points, I was getting the cat off a dock in a stiff crosswind. A fella came along to help and kept hollering at me to 'turn the wheel!" Had I done so, I would have pivoted my sterns right into the dock, as the rudder is a couple feet forward of the transom...

Certainly as was mentioned above it makes far more sense for the stronger one to handle lines as one is docking. Also it is my observation that women tend to make better helms, I guess we notice nuances.

I really think 'cute' things like calling women 'admiral' and other such patronizing remarks etc demonstrate the chauvinism I experience with frequency in the sailing world. Maybe the pursuit of sailing just attracts chauvinists, and with that, women are relegated to galley slavery. Who knows?
I think you are a tad oversensitive about remarks of others and look for examples, while at the same time making sweeping generalizations about men, just what you complain about men doing to you and other women

My wife who coowns our boat is experienced enough to handle both the lines and docking the vessel. Instead of getting persnickety when someone makes a remark someone looking for a fight would consider sexist, she instead smiles disarmingly at them and dazzles them with her confidence and sailing prowess.

I terms of docking to me its not the one who has the strength working the ines but more importantly the one who has the experience to put and hold the boat in the correct position so that it can be tied up


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post #165 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

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Originally Posted by Multihullgirl View Post
I really think 'cute' things like calling women 'admiral' and other such patronizing remarks etc demonstrate the chauvinism I experience with frequency in the sailing world. Maybe the pursuit of sailing just attracts chauvinists, and with that, women are relegated to galley slavery. Who knows?
Calling the woman "The Admiral" is a bit cute but it also usually applies correctly - the Captain controls the ships operations, the Admiral controls the ships movements - the way it usually is onboard our boats.

I, myself, personally intend to continue being outspoken and opinionated, intolerant of all fanatics, fools and ignoramuses, deeply suspicious of all those who have "found the answer" and on my bad days, downright rude.
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post #166 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

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I think you are a tad oversensitive about remarks of others and look for examples, while at the same time making sweeping generalizations about men, just what you complain about men doing to you and other women
You've got to be kidding me. Ten minutes of reading any sailing forum will tell you all you need to know about whether there is chauvinism in sailing... It's real easy not to see chauvinism when you're not on the receiving end of it... it ain't just me - husband sees it too - he's less tolerant than I

Tell me this: why is it there's no patronizing, pejorative little names for men aboard boats, similar to the 'Admiral' term?

Tell me this: why is it that almost without exception, on the dock, men strike up conversations with us, and then immediately turn to husband, and address him, excluding me, if a question about the boat itself or something technical comes up?

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post #167 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

How about "Deck Ape"? "Sewerman"? "Rail Meat"?

The reason men turn to the other men is simply because women like you, Denise etc. are so rare. I always speak to both to see what's what first - maybe other guys aren't so polite. I don't have to take my socks off to count the number of women I've met on the docks & in the boatyards that knew what was what - all the others turned to their man for answers.

It ain't all our fault.

I, myself, personally intend to continue being outspoken and opinionated, intolerant of all fanatics, fools and ignoramuses, deeply suspicious of all those who have "found the answer" and on my bad days, downright rude.
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post #168 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

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How about "Deck Ape"? "Sewerman"? "Rail Meat"?
Those are applied to both sexes. Got another example?

We might be rare, I can dig that. No reason to make assumptions, and certainly no reason to persist once the chick shows some knowledge...
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post #169 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

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While I was scrounging ballast for Thane 39 years ago I found myself in competition with a woman building her 38 ft ferro sailboat. She went on to complete the vessel and cruise the coast and live aboard for many years . Too bad there is not more of this caliber of people on the waterfront. Even the men seem to have become fru fru or hand wringers.

I was delivering a boat last weekend. We sold our piano and a lady came to pick it up with two guys and her husband.

They were trying to get the piano out the door and it became obvious to my wife that the two automatic door closers had to come off first so the storm door would open all the way.

The three guys involved with the piano and two other guys my wife snagged off the street couldn't figure out how to disconnect the door closers.

She did find one guy who could get them off but didn't know how to put them back on.

Apparently tool use is no longer a human art much less a mainly occupation.

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post #170 of 231 Old 06-30-2014
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Re: How many women here own their own boat?

Just popped in here, so I apologize for not being up to speed on all that has been said, but to pick up on the current themes:

In my experience sexism is alive and well in the sailing and cruising community. Multihullgirl is bang on in her observations. In my world the use of "admiral" is usually used in a smarmy sexist way. It's most often used by older men (I am 47) in reference to their wives or significant others, and rarely is it meant as complimentary.

My partner/wife is an equal partner in all that we do. She's a better helm's person, I'm good at sailing. She's a better navigator, I'm a better cook She's the engine rat, I excel at the electrical and plumbing. We both have our strengths and weaknesses, but we both do it all. Underway we alternate captain/helm duties with deck/galley. We discuss, and make decisions together. But in times of crisis, who ever's on helm calls the shots.

We both feel the sexism, mostly from the older men in our community. It's hard to deal with b/c it's not meant as harmful, and my partner and I mostly ignore it. But in our world, it is real, although diminishing as the older guys go off to pasture.

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