... But for the past maybe two years i have been deathly afraid of the heeling of a boat..!
The best way to get over your fears of any kind is to confront them. You can do that gradually, at your own comfort level, or immediately.
Gradually, you could sail in stronger and stronger wind conditions to become accustomed to healing.
Immediately, while sailing upwind, you could steer the boat off the wind until it is broadside to the wind. Hang on tight.
Using either method, you will discover that a keel boat will only go over so far, then the wind begins to deflect off the sail while the ballast pulls the boat back up, the boat floats high above the water, even when healed over at extreme angles, and the boat will eventually pop back upright when the force decreases.
Running away from your fears, avoiding them, never works. You will simply become a fearful person who has lost confidence in yourself. You might as well make the decision to live your life courageously, to face down all your fears, and free yourself from excessive worry. Fear and worry rarely accomplish anything for you and you waste a lot of psychic energy that could be better focused on something productive.
With all your fears, you should also consider what is the worst that could happen. People usually inflate the consequences of their fears. Take heeling: the boat could be knocked over and/or sink, you would find yourself in the water and you could swim to shore or wait to be rescued. So what? That would hardly be the end of the world. You would be wet and inconvenienced. Many have survived worse.