by Alyse Liebowitz
Today I was able to witness many of the calamities that have befallen my own boat and my crew - but this time, it all happened to someone else! I feel vindicated! It's not just us!
When I got to the marina a few days ago, I met my new slip neighbor, Herb, and his "new" boat. He's a car salesman who traded a used car for a used boat. He was very excited about going out for the first time on his new boat with his family. It's his first boat, he told me. No boating experience, but his friend had brought the boat to the marina for him and didn't have any trouble. I smiled and asked Herb if he had towing insurance. He said no, the engine on the fifteen-year-old 25' powerboat was just fine. I smiled again.
I arrived at the marina this morning and saw Sea Tow pulling Herb's boat and at least 13 family members (plus a dog) back into his slip. Apparently, 5 minutes out of the marina, the engine overheated and went into meltdown. Been there, done that myself. He was going to have to do better than that. Sure enough, as everyone else on board was enjoying the sun, the beer, and the chips during the towing experience, Herb ran around the boat trying to get the dock lines ready. No one else knew what to do and didn't seem bothered by that fact. Herb was throwing lines overboard while trying to fend off the pilings as the towboat pushed him into the slip. I helped secure his boat as he rifled through his pockets and everyone else's to find a credit card to pay for the tow...right after which, he signed up for the towing insurance. Smart move. I settled down in my cockpit with a magazine, waiting to see what would happen next. I didn't have to wait long.
As he jumped off the boat to the dock - a very long jump - his momentum carried him right off the dock and into the water. I saw him splash down, holding on to boat's power line, which thankfully hadn't been plugged in yet. Much laughter from the audience on the boat. The dog just looked embarrassed. Herb casually mentioned that his $500 cell phone was now at the bottom of the marina. The kids on the boat decided to use the neighboring slip as a private swimming pool and launched their raft and each other into the water. One kid borrowed my fishing net and started trolling for the cell phone. Another one borrowed my wine opener and the party really got started.
One of the people on board carried a pile of clothes off the boat and onto the dock, where the wind blew most of them into the water. After helping to retrieve the various items with a boat hook, I noticed the kids had abandoned their raft, which had floated under the dock and was on its way across the marina. Several of the kids were trying to offload the dog, an 80 pound Labrador. They managed to push her off the boat, but they missed the dock a bit, so Flossie ended up swimming with the cell phone. More yelling and running around. It took 4 adults to haul her out. I suggested that Herb buy a logbook so he can record these "cry now, laugh later" episodes. He just shook his head and said he couldn't believe it. I'll bet he wishes he had that used car back right about now.
Finally, my crew showed up and we had a great sunset sail. The sea gods had frowned on Herb and decided to smile on us. Nothing broke, no one was hurt, and we made it back to the marina in one piece. I can feel the dark clouds gathering now.
Alyse, along with her co-captain father Dave, has been sailing their 22' Wellcraft Starwind, the Dot Calm
, since 2001. They are members of the Shrewsbury, NJ chapter of the Power Squadrons (http://www.usps.org/localusps/shrews/). The home range for the boat and crew is the Metedeconk River and Barnegat Bay, which is "down the shore" in central New Jersey.
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