Although a serious topic to sailors, this has been bounced around Facebook and such, because the title comes off as odd to most people, and the comments are hilarious:
"TOO Informative. Read this book before going on vacation and I couldn't find my cruise liner in the port. Vacation ruined."
"Captain Trimmer's other excellent titles: How to Avoid a Train, and How to Avoid the Empire State Building"
"- Do not charge the huge ship at full speed in an attempt to scare it off. This may work with coyotes, but it is less effective with huge ships.
- Similarly, do not roll your boat over and play dead. Unless the huge ship is captained by a grizzly bear, this will not work.
- Do not attempt to go under the huge ship. This is typically not successful.
- Do not attempt to jump over the huge ship."
"Given the amount of dog mess that is on the pavements I thought this book would be the ideal read to stop me having to scrape my shoes on the grass before going home. It was only after it arrived that I looked closely at the title and realised it said 'How to Avoid Huge SHIPS'."