Join Date: Jul 2006
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Hate to say it, but it sounds like there are some fundamental trimming skills missing. It's probably time to get an experienced friend/club member/sailmaker out on the boat, or just spring for some on the water tutoring.
If you don't have a cunningham, get one rigged. In 12-15, vang sheeting, a fair amount of backstay on, with someone playing the traveller, you should have no problem sailing your boat.
Here's the general stuff for starters:
Main sheet controls (and vang) the leech twist.
Backstay will bend the mast and flatten the middle/top of the main.
Outhaul flattens the bottom of the main.
Cunningham (or more halyard tension) pulls the draft of the sail forward.
Traveller controls the angle of attack and can help to quickly depower the main in a puff by dropping the sail a bit to leeward as appropriate to control the amount of weather helm you have.
You'll get it figured out! Cheers!