I think you will have a hard time finding one book covering all this. Looking at what I have got:
Safety Preparations for Cruising by Jeremy Hood has a fairly detailed section on reefing.
Best discussion on heaving-to that I have come accross is Storm Tactics by Lin & Larry Pardey. The third Ed has recently been released.
On which sail to reef first, there are a couple of good threads here at Sailnet, one of which is around a month old.
On rigging sails / spinnaker, one book I have is The New Book of Sail Trim ed by Ken Textor. It is a collection of 44 articles published in Sail Magazine. It includes six artcles on spinnakers and eight articles on sails for cruising. My edition was published in 1995, so it aint that new!
Hopes this helps, Ilenart