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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Looks like we will have a new to us sailboat in a few weeks. While we have (mostly me) a few years at the helm I want my wife to have more confidence on the boat. I thought it might be best to hire a woman instructor to take my wife, daughter and grand daughter out on our new boat for instruction. Any recommendations for an instructor in the south Maryland area ?
 
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I recommend having them take an ASA 101 class an perhaps later on a 103. To become comfortable sailing, there is a lot to learn, and I believe the best way to learn is taking a structured three day class, in a boat intended for sailing practice. Cruising boats don't make good learning-the-basics boats. If you think a day (or two) on the water with an instructor, where the scope and learning will be ad hoc, will ensure learning, then I think you are under-estimating what there is to learn. Here is th escope of a 101

With three students, a school should put together a class just for you crew, as you dont want more than three students a boat anyway.

If you check the schools I'm sure you can find a female instructor, although I would say its more important to find a good school and an excellent instructor regardless of sex.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
We took 101 when we started sailing. I'm thinking, getting away and landing at the dock in one piece, anchoring without dragging, tacking, coming about without violent jibes, dodging crab pots, buoys, channel markers, sailing off anchor, reefing, unplugging the head, reading the charts, maybe some electronic instrument instruction. All the normal things of sailing. Maybe an offshore over night from C&D canal down to the Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel on our boat. While the ASA course we took was informative I think they want something a bit less structure and more to the point. I guess what we are looking for is a licensed captain without the overhead of the ASA association. No offense meant. Then again there might be insurance concerns, have to check with our insurer before hiring anyone.
 

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i think you are on the right track with a women only class with a woman instructor. Women simply communicate differently than men and I am sure that your wife, daughter and grand daughter will appreciate this thoughtful gesture. I know there were women only classes offered in Florida before the pandemic and I would think they would be available on the Chessie as well. Even if you only have a woman captain giving instruction on your vessel you will be ahead of the game. SOOOOOOOOOO
What boat did you decide on ????
 

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I totally agree with you yo get an instructor, preferably female.

I am not a good teacher and I really don't need the angst. Plus I would like an instructor do the work and then the 'student' will know I was right all along.

Good luck.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
SOOOOOOOOOO
What boat did you decide on ????
Sure hope I don't jinx this. The surveyor checked out the hull below the water line and found the cutlass bearing is at the end of its life. She splashes next Monday for sea trials. She is a 2005 36 foot Hunter, clean and very well taken care. We aren't crossing oceans or sailing around the horn and pretty sure we will never sail the roaring forty's or the Arctic seas. Majority of our sailing will be the Chesapeake Bay, ICW and the Bahamas. Although Newfound land and down island isn't beyond the realm of possibilities. She has stack pack main (wanted) swim platform, A/C with an on board generator.
 

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Hopefully the seller will replace the cutlass bearing before she is splashed. I made the mistake of not changing mine last haul out and now I'm going to have to haul the boat again to change the bearing costing both haul out and yard time because I was in a hurry to get out of the yard last time. Enjoy you're new to you boat, I don't think you're going to jinx it, they are a lot of boat for the money.
 

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I have had similar ideas about getting someone aboard for some instruction. We are more than a bit a solitary couple. That is not good. It would be great to have others come aboard for sails and also for us to sail on other peoples boats. I know I have a lot to learn. Frankly I wojld lovenit if my Wife went sailing with others a few times —-without ME. I know that just my presence changes a lot of things for her.

Unfortunately she is pretty strongly against the idea.
 

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I think you are thinking in the correct direction getting a women captain/instructor for your wife, daughter and grand daughter. Have them go out for an overnight. My only suggestion would be that you are somewhere else that day or two. Don't even go down to the boat, stay home and do yard work or the laundry. That way you are not influencing their time learning in anyway.
Congrats on the new boat.
 

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... Don't even go down to the boat, stay home and do yard work or the laundry. That way you are not influencing their time learning in anyway...
A spark of genius. By spending the weekend doing laundry and other household chores that might be on their minds while they are out sailing, you will such a positive association with sailing that they won't be able to wait for the next outing. Just make sure they remember to bring you along!
 

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found the cutlass bearing is at the end of its life
If you can a new one out of the deal, all the better. However, these are wear items, so I wouldn't be all that concerned for having to do it myself and then have the wear clock start all over again. I like fresh starts on maintenance.

Good luck with the in-water part of the survey. Hope you'll share how it goes.
 

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Yes, this lady is a licensed captain, does boat deliveries, sail and power, and Youtube training videos. Located in Baltimore, I believe. I'm thinking of hiring her for my wife, sister, and daughter this summer, for the same thing.

 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
If you can a new one out of the deal, all the better. However, these are wear items, so I wouldn't be all that concerned for having to do it myself and then have the wear clock start all over again. I like fresh starts on maintenance.

Good luck with the in-water part of the survey. Hope you'll share how it goes.
Broker called this morning. Owner is going to spring for a new bearing AND the broker found a mobile mechanic to do the installation. The boat gods are smiling on us because the yard is backed up a few weeks. Or they are about to play a very cruel joke.
 

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Following because I'm also interested in these recommendations.

FWIW, I once had a very interesting conversation with a sailing school instructor about sailing lessons and couples. I had always assumed it was best for couples to take classes together separately, but she said they actually encourage couples to take classes together. Her reason: the instructors can better identify bad habits as a couple that are getting in the way of them sailing better together and try to break them. The more experienced sailor can be getting in the way of your spouse building confidence even if you think you are just being helpful. And likewise, your spouse can be avoiding tasks because they are afraid of failing and causing marital discord. It made me think of sailing lessons as combined sailing and marital therapy and I'm thinking the next set of lessons are going to be for both of us on our own boat.
 

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A woman instructor is a person who teaches women. A female instructor is an instructor that is a woman. A male instructor is an instructor that is a man.

Woman is not an adjective. Just sayin'.
 

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A female instructor is an instructor that is a woman.
Birthing person. A birthing person instructor is an instructor that is a birthing person.


Her reason: the instructors can better identify bad habits as a couple that are getting in the way of them sailing better together and try to break them. The more experienced sailor can be getting in the way of your spouse building confidence even if you think you are just being helpful. And likewise, your spouse can be avoiding tasks because they are afraid of failing and causing marital discord.
Yes, I agree with this. After 50 years sailing I am not going back to class. That stupid adage "I've forgotten more than I know" is indeed correct in that many skills and tasks on a boat are so ingrained and I can't communicate how its done to someone else. I know them, can do them, but cant describe them.

Teach someone to tie a bowline? I can't. Just give me the rope NOW, and I will tie it.
So perhaps going back to class would be destructive to some. But I feel classes are good for the person new to sailing :)
Mark
 
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I'm not a fan of ASA at all. They are cookie cutter courses and personal attention is limited by the very nature of the curriculum. I taught it for a few months and did not find it to be anywhere near as good as personal lessons on your own boat, or just going out and playing on your boat.
The sailing isn't the difficult part, after all man has been doing it for eons and it certainly isn't rocket science. A half a day or so will get someone started and from there sailing is the best way to improve your skills. Sailing, sailing and more sailing.
It's the other stuff, like anchoring, the rules of the road (CollRegs), docking, etc that one might want a bit more help with.
A grand little book called Royce's Sailing Illustrated has served me for over 45 years as an aid for new crew to understand what they are doing when asked to pull this string or that. I covers an unbelievable amount of information in one little handbook.
No preachy tome this, but a fun, well written and illustrated guide from your first day aboard, to that first race, cruise or reefed down and going for it day. Anchoring, splicing and how to tie up in a slip or on a dock. I'm not affiliated with it but sure wish I was.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
A woman instructor is a person who teaches women. A female instructor is an instructor that is a woman. A male instructor is an instructor that is a man.

Woman is not an adjective. Just sayin'.
Gezzz.. Maybe I should a request a thread title change to "Looking for a human with XX chromosomes to instruct human with same chromosome pairing"
 

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In all seriousness, as one of the few women here, I think the idea of trying to find a female instructor for the women in your family is a good one, but I wouldn't hesitate to pull the trigger on any good instructor you can find, male or female. The gender here is just an advantage because you are trying to build their confidence, and seeing someone like you do something skillfully also builds confidence, e.g. "if she can do this, I can do this" kind of thing.

(I don't know of any evidence specific to sailing, but having a female teacher in a STEM class turns more women into STEM majors, the effect isn't big but it is measurable. Since sailing is also a male dominated activity, you might expect a similar effect there.)
 
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