Hi Islandgirl, I'm a single female and a single-hander. I'm not suggesting you do anything dangerous, but if you want to sail more often and not have to rely on crew all the time, check out SSS (Singlehanded Sailing Society) and talk to your dock mates about how they do it. There have been times that I have been extremely uncomfortable going through the learning process, but I have also found nothing more gratifying than being able to handle my 38-ft boat whenever I need to, including dockings and pumpouts. I often sail with friends, so I'm no loner either (well, yes, I am, but can be friendly from time to time ;-) but this makes it easier to sail with people who have little or no experience. Good luck and let me know if you ever want to talk through some of this!
Carliane